Page 100 of The Shadow Prince's Ruin
“Gone feral, like we expected.”
I’m nauseated when I think of the dark metal edge anywhere near Hawk’s body. I push it aside, fighting tears.
“He can still be collared!” I raise my voice, because I can’t pretend to be calm any longer when Hawk’s life is at stake.
Tristan frowns, and the moon behind him adds more dimension to the strands of blood red hair that have come loose from his braid. “He’s no longer a person! He's a threat to every shadow-wielder in the realm, and you’re hardly a warrior!”
“That’s enough,” Kyran says curtly, but Tristan won’t be silenced.
“Before you spell that out, yes, I am angry at him for attacking me. But that is not why I want the beast gone. Sylvan’s not trained for fighting. If he goes after the beast, he’ll die for nothing. We’ve had our differences, but he’s still my cousin, and I don’t want that to happen. Reluctantly, I’ll even say he’s the most tolerable Goldweed I ever met,” he adds with a frown.
I take that in but find it hard to focus on anything but Hawk’s plight. “Am I not at risk of execution anyway? If there is any chance that Hawk is still inside the Sunwolf, I must try to bring him back. The collar offers me that chance,” I finish meekly, because it’s all in Kyran’s hands. If he chooses to imprison me right now, I won’t be strong enough to fight him.
His thick, elegant brows lower as he takes in his men, who listen to our exchange, no doubt ready to set out the moment he says the word. It might be Hawk who is to be hunted down, but I sense an invisible noose around my own neck too, because without him my own life will no longer be worth living.
I’m shocked when that thought crosses my mind, but right after comes the realization that it’s not a dramatic exaggeration. I would survive without Hawk. In fact, my life might even return to its pre-banishment state, but how could I forget everything I’ve lost after finally tasting the bond I never expected to forge? It would be a life without purpose, without meaning, drained of the one true joy I’ve ever known.
I need to reclaim Hawk and I’m ready to die trying.
“You do realize a loose Sunwolf threatens the whole Realm? We need strong shadowcraft to defend ourselves,” Tristan says.
Kyran exhales and meets my eyes. “I’ll give you an hour’s advantage. Then, I’ll send the hunters after him.” He gestures at the biggest of the hunters, whose armor is likely heavier than my whole body. “Dame Lorena, you will accompany Prince Sylvan to make sure he doesn’t flee when faced with the beast.”
I should consider that an affront, but I just grab Kyran’s hand, then bow to kiss a ring on his finger. “Thank you for the opportunity. I will not fail, My Lord.”
There’s a brief moment of silence before Kyran speaks. “Good luck. May the sun never burn you.”
I have no reason to feel touched. It’s just one of those things people say, but there’s something about the raspiness in Kyran’svoice that makes him sound genuine. I squeeze his hand and touch it with my forehead before straightening my back. I planned to respond with resolve, but my throat feels tight and raw, so I nod at him, then at Tristan, and finally meet the gaze of my guardian.
The giant woman in front of me squeezes her gauntleted hand into a fist and places it in the middle of her chest, knocking on the breastplate made up of dozens of scales. “Lorena Sheerwhisper of Ocalot Deep,” she says, introducing herself to me before focusing on Kyran. “I shall do as you command, my lord.”
I wait as she receives the same customary blessing I have, and moments later we head for our mounts, watched by dozens of eyes. The knight pulls back her dark hair and mounts the large horse capable of carrying both its mistress and her armor while I use a discreet ladder to reach the back of my kelpie, Octo.
I'm dizzy, as if I’ve had my skull bashed with a club, but I can’t push back the inevitable by excusing myself with a headache. Considering the danger the Sunwolf poses to shadow-wielders, Kyran’s decision to offer me a whole hour to find Hawk is an unexpected kindness. He is offering me more mercy than I deserve, given that my family attempted to assassinate him not long ago, and I shall not squander this chance.
I lead the way out of the improvised camp, through the overgrown gardens, and past the open gates of the abandoned castle, but once I’m no longer distracted by the curious soldiers and their noise, I stare into the dense trees ahead.
“Can you still sense him?” Dame Lorena asks, stopping her mount next to mine.
I blink, surprised she wants to speak to a traitor like me at all. I know her face, as I’ve seen her at court, and in the nearby villages, but this might be the first time we are interacting. After all, the fighters, even the low born, knew the lackluster extentof my shadowcraft. I have once overheard a group of guards discussing it over wine, and their claim that I'm not worthy of my birth stings to this day. But Dame Lorena’s eyes don’t hold any resentment, as if she’s content with her lot in life and doesn’t wish for anything beyond it.
I wonder if there’s perhaps an unusually large amount of human blood in her line. She’s not Hawk’s size, but almost as tall as him, and broader in the shoulders than most of the male elves I’ve seen. It’s no wonder Kyran sent her out with me. If she can wield the massive sword attached to her back with the same ease she guides her horse, then hers might be the blade to end Hawk’s life. If I fail him. Which I will not.
“Yes, I can sense him, but he deserves a chance. Don’t harm him,” I say, sliding my gaze over the thick grip of her weapon.
She regards me with the emotionality of a statue. “I shall do what needs to be done for the greater good. If he doesn’t recognize you—”
“You wait,” I tell her firmly and raise the Umlaris Band in my hand. “The real him might still be in the Sunwolf.”
“I cannot let him harm a member of the royal family.”
“Have you never loved?” I ask as worry and frustration grow in my chest like a tide, but my words make her avert her gaze, as if I’ve struck the right chord. I don’t need her to answer. Whoever she had feelings for is no longer with her, whether they’re alive, or dead.
“What happened to them?” I ask.
She exhales, looking north, toward the ocean. A shadow passes over her features before she speaks. “Heartbreak. He died when the monster attacked. He did his duty and protected the people. And so will I.”
My lips go dry, because the tragedy is still very fresh. Memories of the dreadful day three months ago pass through mymind in a whirlwind of terror. I ran and lived. Her lover stayed and is with us no longer.
