Page 240 of Cross the Line
I don’t know if that’s me. Whether it can be me. Nonetheless, it’s all I want to be—their strength, their home, their everything.
Seeing them like this has me more grateful than ever to have them back with me.
Even though I know we have to fully address the events of last night together, I’m in no rush to hash it all out as I slip to my feet and take both of their hands in mine.
I guide them to the other side of the couch and, once I settle into the chaise section, I pat the deep cushion next to me for them to join me.
Jayden lies down first, placing his head in my lap with a needy nuzzle while Eli lies next to him. They’re wrapped around each other when I pull JJ’s nap blanket over them, and Blanca jumps up to snuggle them.
With me rubbing their heads, it doesn’t take long for them to fall asleep. I’m not sure who’s snoring, my guys or Blanca, as I put on a mindless reality show and slowly drift off, holding them.
***
Eli’son the phone with Taylor when Jayden follows me into the laundry room. He’s freshly showered, and his scent is warm in the air while he watches me sort through their laundry from the last two days.
Leaning against the wall beside me, he grasps my waist and brings me into him. Every muscle of his body flexes into mine, accenting the softness of my curves with the hardness of his lines. When he cups my face, lifting my stare to his, the raw emotions flooding the muddy depths rake through me.
I can’t resist the pull in my belly, tugging me to him—urging me to give him the comfort he needs.
“Lucky,” the hoarse murmur fists my heart.
“Yes, JJ…”
The way he’s chewing on his lip makes it plenty obvious he wants totalk in spite of his silence, and after a few attempts at opening his mouth, he sags down the wall a tad, bringing himself level with me.
The longer he takes to speak, the tighter my insides coil.
“What is it? What’s wrong?”
Shaking his head, he keeps a hand anchored on my hip while molding the other to my face. “You’re so damn precious. Real fucking beautiful…”
“That’s not answering my question.” My palms flatten to his pounding chest, and every word he doesn’t say amps up the nausea roiling in my stomach. Because every word he doesn’t say, coupled with the twisted expression on his face, sounds a lot like my heart is about to be torn from my chest.
With a deep inhale, he tells me, “Eli told coach about Presley.”
Oh, the breath I was holding escapes in a relieved whoosh. “He did?”
His brows are wrinkled together while he replies, “Yes, this morning.”
“This is good.”
His head cants with a chuff. “Is it?”
“Yes. Eli deserves to get some form of justice, and perhaps Presley will finally get some kind of comeuppance.” He’s looking at me like I’m not seeing the whole picture. As though I’m missing a glaring detail. “Isn’t this what we wanted for him?”
“I don’t know, Fin. The other night…” Jayden drops his head as his fingers claw deeper into my hip, and the hand on my face shifts to my shoulder. “Fuck, I know he didn’t hurt himself. I know he’s trying, and talking to Connie is helping him. But if Salem’s knowing triggered him, what happens when it’s the stranger walking past him on the street, or the person at the checkout at the store, or…”
“JJ, people already stop and stare. Because you’re attractive men. You’re hockey stars. People stare, and they’re going to keep staring. They’re curious and?—”
“This is different,” he whispers, head falling back into the wall as he looks up at the ceiling pleadingly.
“Yes, it is.”
“The fucking stranger on the street won’t just stare at him, Fin. The cashier, the barista, the client that you meet with. They’ll stare at you, too. Do you get that?” Jayden’s twisted face levels on mine again. His eyes are drowning as he sucks his lip into his mouth. “They’re going to talk, say hideous things that will make those other messages you received pale in comparison.”
“You think they don’t already say and do shitty things? A guy refused to serve me at a coffee shop the other day. A girl at the mall called me a slut to her friend.”
“What? Where… who? What the fuck?” He appears genuinely shocked, even though we both know it’s not surprising. “Why didn’t you tell us?”
