Page 114 of Break the Ice
I can’t imagine not being a part of his life or him being a constant in mine.
“If you had it under control before what’s changed?” Finley asks, watching him closely for an answer that takes too long to come. “Eli…?”
“Stress. There is so much going on lately and?—”
“So, it’s me. Me being here. You bringing me here,” she whispers, dropping her teary stare down to her lap as her hands shake out her curls around her face.
I tear my eyes from her, finding Eli’s devastated frown.
Fuck.
No. It’s not true.
I know I thought a lot of shit about who Finley is at first. I believed she would be trouble, but I was wrong.
Finley is everything I didn’t know I needed.
Everythingweneed. And I know Elijah feels that too because why else would he be so grief-stricken about his words and what they imply?
I shake my head at him, hoping he can read my thoughts as I pull her into my side, short of all the way onto my lap so she knows that she’s more than wanted here. She’sneeded.
“Fin,” he murmurs, slowly easing himself onto his knees in front of her so he can peer beneath the curtain of hair hiding her from us. “Finley…”
She attempts to ball tighter, but I squeeze my arm around her harder, making it impossible for her to curl into herself and hide away.
“Finley-James, look at me, dammit!” He snaps at her, still holding on to his gentility so that she knows he’s not upset with her. When she peers at him, he moves closer, enveloping himself behind her hair. “You are not the fucking problem. You’ve never been a problem… not to me, sweet girl. Not ever.”
“Bullshit,” she sobs back.
It’s the first time I’ve heard her curse, and that only makes it sound harsher from her lips.
His hands push up from her face into her hair, bringing it back into view. All I can do not to wrap myself around her and shield her from the world is tuck my face into her sweet peach scented hair and press a kiss to her head. Above where his hand is still tangled and fisting the light bronze strands.
“None of this is your doing,” he assures her, glancing up at me with a grateful smile when I press another kiss to the top of her head and tell her, “You’ve done nothing wrong.”
When Elijah leans closer, I carefully guide her forehead to his. I can feel him resisting the need to be closer to her, and after everything that’s happened,why should he?
He needs her and she needs him. It’s obvious, and I feel their need for one another pull at my insides, knotting them so tight that if they don’t give in, I might die.
Dramatic?Maybe.
And yet, it’s the visceral truth.
“I want you here. With me,” Elijah says, his thumbs kneading her temples as his eyes flicker to mine and he whispers, “We need you here with us.”
Every syllable hits that place that’s been aching for him. For years.
“The migraine is gone, and I have meds to prevent an episode like this again. I have to be more mindful of my limits.”
Eli focuses back on Fin before slowly peeling himself away from her with the softest kiss to her forehead. Then he carefully lifts himself back onto the coffee table.
“Aside from rest and meds, what happens now? With you?” I ask, knowing the answer isn’t going to be easy for him to give me.
“I spoke with Coach and Doc after I left the hospital. We’re going to try Biofeedback training. Doc and PT Jordan think I can work on mind-body techniques to help me control stress and what it does to me.” He sighs. “Coach is taking my neurologist’s advice and benching me for the next two weeks. Instead of training with the team he wants me to work with Jordan on breathing techniques.”
The dejection in his voice sinks like a rock to the pit of my stomach.
“What can I do? To help?”
