Page 184 of Break the Ice
I move before I lose my nerve, kneeling beside them and refolding the towel to the warm side.
“Let me,” I murmur, because they’ve spent years taking care of me and now, it’s my turn.
Jayden hesitates, then leans back, letting me close.
Finley barely stirs as I clean her, my hands careful on her sensitive skin. It’s so pretty with Jayden’s marks on it, covering the scars. While I take care of her, she just makes a soft, sleepy sound and curls instinctively closer to Jayden’s bare chest like she belongs there.
When I glance up, he’s watching me with that same quiet intensity he’s holding her with, like he can feel the shift happening inside me.Like he knows I’m falling for him while he falls for her—and it doesn’t feel wrong.
It feels likehome.
When I finish, Jayden gathers Finley into his arms. She tucks her face into his neck, already half-asleep, as he stands and steps out of his jeans.
Peppering gentle kisses to her temple, he starts toward her room. Panic sucker punches me into gear, moving my feet after him.
I don’t want him to go. To leave Finley… or me.
“JJ.” Jayden glances back at me. “Stay. Please.”
“Eli…”
“Don’t leave her. Stay here… just for tonight.Please.”
I can’t read his expression, but he nods once and carries her down the hall.
I follow as far as the doorway. Watch him lay Finley in bed and carefully slide in next to her before he pulls the blanket up over them both.
Finley curls into his side instinctively when his arm wraps around her waist like he’s done it a thousand times before.
Watching him do for her what I can’t, should hurt. Seeing him give her what I can’t, should kill me.
It doesn’t.
It makes me ache for something bigger than myself.
So much so that when he tells me, “Come here,” I go to them.
His hand pats the bed on Finley’s other side, and I can’t stop myself from laying next to her.
Curled up on my side, I stay stock still with Jayden’s eyes on me. They’re heavy with sleep and it doesn’t take long for his quiet, breathy snores to fall into sync with our girl’s even breaths.
Our girl.
I like that. How it sounds in my head as I carefully slide out of the bed and head to my room.
Even with the melatonin and the Trazodone, I don't trust myself not to wake them with my nightmares, or worse the sleepwalking. It hasn’t happened since I started taking the meds, but now that I’m weaning off them, I’m afraid it’s all going to come back. And I don’t want to hurt them with it.
My collapse has scarred them enough.
In my room, I strip down with shaking hands. Finley’s scent clings tomy skin, to the air, to the soft panties I pull from the pocket of my jeans when I fall into bed.
Heat smothers my lungs as I press them to my face.
Jayden was right. She tastes so damn good. Better than every memory I’ve ever hoarded of her, better than I could’ve imagined.
But it’s not just her face I see when I close my eyes.
It’s the broad line of Jayden’s shoulders braced above her. The rough drag of his voice when he told her to say his name. The way his release shook him apart while I watched, rooted to the floor and coming apart right along with him.
