Page 51 of Not All Himbos Wear Capes
Wolfgang was already waiting for me in the archives, reinforcing his reputation as not only the most powerful of my siblings, but the creepiest. He was the firstborn of Glacial Girl and Apocalypto Man, and the entire reason the United Super Nations started requiring supes to register their spawn with the organization.
Killing your nanny with touch alone tends to freak people out.
No supe could kill their own parents—an evolutionary precaution, no doubt—but all bets were off with siblings. Wolfgang was supposed to wear special gloves when he was around us, but he often ignored the decree for maximum intimidation. That my brother had worn his gloves and chosen to not terrify me today was promising.
“How can I assist?” His tone was uninterested, but I knew he missed nothing. “Mother says you believe you’re finally developing powers.”
Fifty bucks says the Suarez group chat is lit right now.
I was suddenly questioning why I’d divulged that random—mostly unproven—observation to my mother, especially if it meant my family would paymoreattention to me. I’d solidified my standing with them through my inventions and comparatively cool head, but was otherwise—blessedly—left to my own devices.
Weighing my options, I chose the lesser of two evils. “I doubt it. To be honest, I’m really just here to refresh myself on the laws about supes and normies dating.”
Unfortunately, this tidbit seemed to interest him more.“You’reserious about someone? Are they part sea creature?”
I rolled my eyes. “Har har. Yes, hell hath frozen. Seriously, what else am I supposed to do? I refuse to end up as the Suarez spinster just because I’m not seen as prime breeding stock to other supes.”
Plus, I don’t do pussy.
Most villains were sociopaths to some extent—and most heroes too, in my opinion—so thelastthing I expected to see on Wolfgang’s face wassadness.
“At least you have options,” he mumbled, glancing down at his gloved hands. “If mother and father ever accept any of the villain families currently bidding on me, anybreedingwill have to be accomplished via artificial insemination.”
Well, shit.
I gaped at my brother, suddenly overcome with what could only be empathy. “Fuck, Wolfy, I never even considered that. You know I’m so far removed from this wheeling and dealing between families—”
“You won’t be if it turns out you have powers,” he absently mused before switching gears. “But don’t cry for me, Xanny. Luckily, mydickis immune to The Hand of Death.”
I cackled in appreciation of his dry humor. For all our petty spats—and outright death threats—my siblings and I did have rare moments of camaraderie.
And there’s no way in hell I’m going to waste Wolfgang’s good mood.
“Have you everfound anything in our archives about non-governmental normies being allowed to learn a supe’s true identity?” I hesitantly asked. While it made my skin crawl to give anyone in my family ammunition against me, I was emboldened by my brother’s rare show of vulnerability.
He scoffed, gesturing at the shelves and file cabinets around us. “Do you really think our parents would keep anything here that implied anormiecould be treated as an equal?”
Touché.
Just as my hope for a future with Butch started to dissolve, Wolfgang tapped his bottom lip thoughtfully. “Although… When I was brought to the United Super Nations complex as a kid—for the hearing—I overheard some clerks discussing a petition they were working on. It was in favor of heroes and villains being allowed to wed, so perhaps they’ve been working on similar allowances for supes and normies.”
My eyes almost popped out of my skull. “Why the fuck would I ever want to marry ahero?”
Regardless of any Captain Masculine roleplay I have planned for Butch.
Wolfgang threw up his deadly hands. “Don’t ask me! It’s probably why we haven’t heard anything more about it in all this time. But I would bet the USN hasless biased records if you could get to them.”
Which I can’t.
Unfortunately, heroes and villains were only allowed in that neutral zone by invitation, and heavily monitored while there. I opened my mouth to point this out, then promptly snapped it closed again once I actually considered his suggestion.
While all five of my siblings were registered at the USN—with headshots updated annually—I’d never been officially declared. It wouldn’t be the easiest complex to infiltrate, even with me being an unknown villain, but everyone knew Biggs Enterprises had connections there.
And I have a connection at Biggs.
“You’ve thought of something.” Wolfgang’s tone turned dangerous as an evil grin stretched across his face. “Please tell me there will be bloodshed.”
I couldn’t help matching his wicked smile, always game to cause chaos. “I wasn’t planning on it, but we’ll see what happens. Either way, I suppose I’m done here, and you no longer have to babysit.”
