Page 58 of A Song of Saints and Swans
Asa smiled sweetly. “Not unless you have a secret fast food mascot fetish.”
We all watched as he donned a white linen suit jacket, odd ribbon tie, and a mustache and pointy beard before stuffing his curls under a wig.
When he caught our confused looks, Asa shrugged. “Since everyone outside of the South thinks our accents all sound the same, I may as well be Colonel Sanders.”
I don’t know who that is, but he sounds suspicious.
“Well, now I’m craving fried chicken,” Nox grumbled, zipping himself into his full-body outfit. “Please tell me you got Tan something as humiliating as this.”
Asa barked a laugh, bravely reaching up to pet Nox’s furry head. “Even more so… not that it will actually embarrass him—”
“A DILDO!” Tan shouted, earning him giggles from a passing gang of teenagers. “How did you know it has been a lifelong dream of mine to embody a man-sized sex toy?”
We all could have guessed.
Nox was unable to maintain his dark cloud of gloom in the presence of his closest friend’s ridiculousness, but I was bracing myself for whatever Asa had in store for me.
“And for Vasi,” he drawled, taking his time with the grand reveal. “Thesweetestlittle sorceress I’ve ever met… a witch costume.”
A witch costume.
Tan and Nox burst into uncontrollable laughter as I took the package from Asa with a look of sheer disdain. As I feared, the costume included the horrid pointy hat humans in this cursed town seemed to favor, but that wasn’t the worst of it.
“I’m not wearing that,” I snapped, tossing the prosthetic green nose at the nearest Rider—who happened to be Nox.
“If I’m being forced to dress like a goddamnfurry,you sure as shit are gonna wear a witch costume,” Nox laughed. Using his enormous frame to trap me against the building, he wrestled me into the hat and nose—unyielding even when I clawed him until he bled.
“All you’re doing is making him harder, Vasi,” Tan chuckled, standing sentry as a giant dildo while we battled. “Thanks to this bond situation, I can no longer tell if my boners are even my own anymore. The three of us are like one collective hard-on in your presence,tutly juddah,and now you look even cuter.”
“I am not cute!” I hissed, wondering why I hadn’t killed these men in their sleep when I had the chance.
Theyare the ones lucky for being cute.
“Thank you forsufferingthrough this for me, sweetness,” Asa cooed, handing me a broom I was definitely going to spank him with later. “Now let me explain thetrickpart of trick-or-treating to you…”
* * *
Hours later, we’d visited every business along Essex Street, demanding candy, and I’d invoked every trick at my disposal against all who displeased me.
No one was spared.
Now we’d taken over the corner of a riotously packed bar so my men could drain the taps dry. Along the way, I’d purposefully lost both my fake nose and the ridiculous broom, but every time I attempted to similarly misplace the witch hat, one of my Riders slapped it back on my head.
“Don’t even think about getting rid of this,Vashka,”Nox growled in my ear as I reached for it again. “I want to bend you over while you’re wearing it.”
Tan and Asa both groaned as lust shot down my spine. When we’d first arrived, Nox had claimed one of the two available bar stools and pulled me onto his lap. Now he snuck a huge hand up the front of my black Kawaii dress before releasing a groan of his own.
“Vasi, your refusal to wear goddamn underwear is going to fucking kill me.”
Instead of pointing out how being demigods excluded my Riders from a permanent place in the Nav, I wiggled against the enormous erection I could feel through his furry armor.
May as well begin my revenge.
“Don’t think I won’t fuck you right here against this filthy bar, witch,” Nox chuckled, lifting me with one arm to begin threateningly unzipping his costume beneath me with the other hand.
“You wouldn’t dare,” I laughed, but my humor instantly faded when I caught sight of my other Riders’ expressions.
Tan had taken the other barstool so he could wrap himself around Asa from behind and shower him with lecherous affection, but both men had their full attention aimed at us now.
