Page 6 of A Song of Saints and Swans
Who is this man, and what has he done with Jarilo?
The astonishment on my face must have been clear as day, as the god immediately backpedaled. “Whatever. Forget I asked,” he huffed, rolling his eyes, restored to his usual infuriating self. “I’ll leave you to update the swan, dearest. I need to go see if the locals can point me toward any feathered competition.”
My mouth was still hanging open when he strode from the wagon, presumably to go pick a fight with an unsuspecting swan. It was only Marena gently tapping on my chin with her fingertips that snapped it closed—and brought me back to the conversation.
“It’s an excellent question, ‘Thia.” She smiled at me in that endlessly patient way of hers. “Would it harm you less if I were to simply tell you what the letter said?”
“It would,” I absently murmured. “I just… I didn’t expecthimto offer that.”
She laughed. “Yes, well, Jar has his moments.” The goddess’ tranquil expression turned cautious. “Although you should know, he’s quite set on this consort business.”
I groaned and flopped back onto the mattress with my arm slung over my face. “Will it cure the imbecile of this misguided infatuation if I just fuck him and get it over with? Then he could move on to torture someone else and let me live my life.”
Not that anyone could call this living.
Marena was quiet for so long, I uncovered my eyes to curiously peer up at her.
To my surprise, she was intently staring at the floor—as vexed as I’d ever seen her. Her dark eyelashes were stark against her pale skin, and I found my gaze drawn to the way her gorgeous red hair spilled around her shoulders.
“If that’s what you feel you should do,” she muttered, chewing on her plump bottom lip in a way that caused an unexpected warmth to flush through.
Does the idea bother her?
Does it botherme?
“I was mostly kidding, Rena. If I humored Jarilo, I fear his obsession would reach unbearable—possibly full-blown stalker—levels.” I laughed lightly and sat back up before sobering. “I also would never want to come between you and your twin.”
Especially as I’m now questioningourrelationship…
Her gaze snapped to mine, the pale skin of her freckled cheeks pinking. “No, we couldn’t have that.” She stared at me with an unreadable expression for another moment before clearing her throat and refocusing. “So, about the latest letter from the emporium…”
I braced myself for whatever my friend was about to say. It wouldn’t be the first correspondence I’d received, bearing the same royal seal as the one I’d discovered in my mother’s abandoned wagon hundreds of years ago. At this point, I was aware the swan I’dthoughtwas my father wasn’t, and that I had royal blood in my veins from the man who was.
Humanblood.
All shifters knew humans were the enemy. It was a deeply ingrained awareness validated each time large segments of the population proved how horrible they were. My treatment at the Facility had only cemented that reputation, and I still worried about what might be done with the blood samples taken from me while there.
Then there was the added guilt of hiding such a damning secret from the swan clan I was expected to lead someday. Gerard was eager to pass the torch, which meant time was running out for me to tell him the truth only a handful knew.
Marena was one of the few, as she’d kindly offered to be the middleman each time a letter appeared from the ether to the washed-up eccentric who ownedFanny Flutter’s Pleasure Emporiumin London.
Unfortunately, Rena’s involvement meant Jarilo had decided it was alsohisbusiness, but I’d long given up trying to convince him otherwise.
Vasi and her Riders were also aware of my lineage, but that was because Moonstone had crassly announced it to everyone during our ritual to return Nox to corporeal form.
I’m surprised she didn’t take credit for the entire story while she was at it.
Needless to say, there was no love lost between me and the old busybody. Tan didn’t seem to like her either, despite growing up with her as an honorary aunt, so I felt justified in my opinion. In the end, I was content to keep my distance, even ifshecouldn’t seem to stop obsessing overmylife by creepily stalking it.
“I understand the last thing you want to do is reopen these old wounds,” Marena softly spoke, placing her hand over mine and drawing my attention away from someone who didn’t deserve my time.
People like Moonstone end up digging their own graves in the end, anyway.
The warmth of Rena’s palm against my skin instantly settled the maelstrom of anxiety swirling inside of me—just like it always did. I understood she would never enter my thoughts without permission, but the goddess also knew me so well by now, she didn’t have to.
My lungs emptied with a heavy sigh. “No, I don’t. But I also suspect the secret to exorcizing my demons is to face them head-on.”
I was no longer surprised by the vulnerability I could show Marena, even though that level of trust was unusual for me. Something about her emboldened me—encouraged me to step out of my comfort zone—while also making me feel extremely safe.
