Page 45 of Tasting Fire
“He was the kind of man who doesn’t have anything to lose. I just happened to be a barrier to him. He didn’t care what he had to do to get through that barrier, even if it meant putting a bullet in it. In me. Cash, you saved my life. You put everything on the line to protect the entire team in that house. How could I possibly reprimand you for that? You were clear-thinking, decisive, and damn efficient. This team can’t ask for better leadership than that.”
His face softened, making her want to reach out and draw it to hers. Making her want to press her lips to his. But she couldn’t, not here.
“I didn’t trust you,” Cash said finally.
“Then why would you walk through a door with me? Trust is everything on the tac team. You can’t operate that way and possibly feel safe.”
“No,” he said. “Today, I trusted you with my life. You’re damn good at your job, Em, and so is everyone else on the team. I can’t tell you what it felt like to think he was about to press that trigger. That I would lose you again.”
He took her hand and held it to his chest. “I mean I didn’t trust you with this. Not again. I know we were only kids. I talked smack and pretended you’d scraped up my ego, but we both know the truth was that you broke my heart. My chest felt like someone had cracked it open and sliced my heart in half.”
“Oh, Cash.”
“And the real hell of it was that I knew you didn’t feel the same way. How could you and walk away? It just wasn’t possible. And that was more painful and humiliating than being pitied by this whole damn town.”
“We were young, but my decision wasn’t based on how much I cared about you.” About how much she still cared about him. “You know medical school was what I always wanted.” What she’d believed would honor her dad’s memory. Would make his death mean something.
“I wouldn’t have stood in your way, but that’s not the point of this conversation.” He took a breath and blew it out. “When meth monster pulled that gun on you, I didn’t just feel like my heart had been sliced or broken. It felt like it was being ripped out of my body. I’m not sure what that means exactly, but I can’t keep denying that I still feel something for you, Em.”
Which meant there was hope for them.
“And when I care about people, I’ll do anything in my power to protect them. Even if it means hurting them.”
Emmy’s body went cold. “What are you saying?”
“When I showed up at your place earlier, I came to tell you that rumors are circulating all over town.”
“About?”
“About how you killed a young Hispanic boy.”
