Page 78 of The Princess of Nothing
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
“It shouldn’t have happened.” I spoke quickly, running my finger along the spines of several books lining the shelf. I glanced at Blaise, then looked back at the shelf. The evocative smell of leather and parchment hovered around us. “Us,” I said. When I closed my eyes, I could feel the kiss still lingering against my lips from the other day. I hated how I needed him, even when I didn’t want to. I buried those feelings deeply, where no one could find them. “But I wanted to apologize for hurting you.”
“I’m sorry too,” he admitted. “I shouldn’t have snapped. Although, I won’t apologize for kissing you.” He leaned against the doorframe lazily and drank the last of his blossomdew. “Is this the only reason why you’ve requested my presence? Or is this about Edgar requesting you go to Magaelor?”
“No. I have it on good authority he will not abdicate under any circumstance.” My mind wandered back to Morgana’s words. “There are two things, but for now, my mind is on something else.”
“Then what do you want?” He moved past me and sat on a red plush bench, which stood under a large portrait of Blaise’s grandfather. He had the same brooding, gray eyes. He lived centuries ago, choosing to die when Azrael took the throne.
“I want to talk to you about the Objects of Kai, but mostly the Crown of Discieti.” I placed my hand on my hip. “I know everything. You wore it. You’re cursed. You threw it away. Am I wrong?”
He cast his gaze downward. “Wow.” He twiddled his thumbs. “You kept that quiet. Anyway, it’s more complicated than that.”
“I have time.” I looked through the glass and crisscrossed lead at the moon, barely visible in the purple sky. I promised Morgana we would walk down to the frozen lake to talk more, after filling her in on almost every detail since we’d been apart, but the clouds rolled in fast, bringing with it a wind that swept through the cracks around the windows. A blizzard was coming, which would force us all inside. I huddled my fur coat and licked my lips. “I need to know the full story, from you.”
“Power ruined everything for me.” He moved his tortured stare to the window. “I was foolish and young. Just turned fourteen. The Crown of Discieti had been brought to the castle at my father’s command. He never did tell me of the curse on the Objects of Kai. I had no idea, only about the dagger.”
“Oh, Blaise.”
He balled his fists, tears pooling in his moonlit eyes. “It had the power of compulsion. What an allure to a young prince who eagerly wanted to be king. My father was harder on me than Lucien or Niam. Cruel, some would say. I wanted it to stop, and I finally had an object that could control him.”
“I didn’t know.”
“How could you or anyone? He was the most powerful man in the world. Even King Xenos feared him. He was ruthless since his queen died. He only courted my mother to produce an heir, then discarded her as if she were nothing. I believe her to be dead, even though my father said he just sent her away. He never did like loose ends.” He shuddered. “So I stole it. When I placed it on my head, I felt enormous power bequeathed to me. The euphoric rush buzzed throughout my body. I’d never felt anything so intense before.” He adjusted his silver crown, then ran his fingers down the buttons on his black shirt and stopped at one, twisting it. “But all magic, Winter, comes with a price. It started small. I suddenly didn’t care when friends left me out to go to a party in the forest or if one of the girlfriends I had was flirting with another. Before long, I couldn’t feel anything to its full extent. My emotions were numbed. Over time, I tried to feel anything meeting different girls, desperately wanting to give my heart, but it wasn’t to be. When I left the academy, I didn’t miss it. When Lucien and Niam left court, I didn’t think about them. I used to love my brothers, protect them, but after that...” He trailed off.
“Did you use the compulsion?” I asked.
He nodded his head. “At first, yes. It was fun for a time, until it wasn’t.” His irises swirled into a darker color. I noticed they often adjusted shades or glinted another color, depending on his emotions. It was subtle, but I could usually tell. “There was a girl at court. She was unlike the others. She was prudish and strict on herself. Too much. Like she was hiding something.” Regret spilled through his expression. “I told her to loosen up, have fun, and not worry about consequences. To give in to her desires. Three days later, she turned dark, taking having fun to a whole new level. Before I could change her back, my father recognized her becoming like the rest of the feral fae in the villages and killed her with the dagger.”
My hand shot to my mouth. “Are all the feral fae compelled?”
“No. They’re just more darkly inclined than most of our civilization. It happens when they allow themselves to indulge their senses too much and their desires are to hurt. I couldn’t have known her wants were so sinister. If I had...” He closed his eyes, blew out a long breath, and opened them again. “I would never have said those words to her. It’s hard for me. I feel pain deeply but not love. It’s like a barrier.” He looked over at me, teetering on the edge of words that didn’t come.
“That’s why you’ve been looking for the Objects of Kai, to break the curse, right?”
He nodded. “I always wanted to, but it wasn’t at the forefront of my mind. I kept track of them but never sought them out. Until this year.”
“What changed?”
“I found my motivation.”
My eyebrows pinched downward. “What motivation?”
“I think we both know the answer to that.”
I swallowed thickly. “Uh... so the, um.” Warmth flushed my face. “The mer king, Aqugar.” I spluttered, regrouping my thoughts. “He wants the same thing. He’s cursed too. It’s how I found out about you. He spoke with me, said I was the best chance at finding the objects or something.”
His eyes shone brightly. “He has the crown then, as I’d guessed. I’d thrown it into the ocean, believing it would rid me of the curse.” He scoffed. “A short-lived dream.”
“I will bring them together, I promise.” I sat beside him, easing backward.
His eyes regarded me. He reached across and brushed a lock of my hair, tucking it behind my ear. “You don’t need to do anything.”
“Aqugar said I’m the one he foresees finding them. As you know well by now, they are powerful divinators. I doubt he is wrong.”
