Page 81 of The Princess of Nothing
“I’ll make some tonight. I’m sure I can find the ingredients in this castle somewhere.”
“Thank you.” I closed my eyes, finding relief in knowing I’d soon have my capsules to get me through my days.
She squeezed my shoulders. “One day at a time. Okay. Now, onto something else, if that’s okay.”
I nodded, and she continued.
“What you told me about the dragons poses a big problem. I have been conferring with Licia.”
The corner of my lip twitched. “Not him.”
“He is a means to an end.”
“He duped me not once”—I put two fingers in the air—“but twice the last time I was here. He’s a con artist. He doesn’t care to help anyone but himself.”
Her lips pressed into a hard line. “I appreciate you looking out for me, but you need not worry yourself where I am concerned. I am capable of seeing through others.” She lowered her shuttered gaze to mine. “Perhaps more than you.”
I slumped my shoulders. “Fine, but if he crosses you, I will kill him. I know where the dagger is.”
She laughed. “I have missed your youthful view, although I see your rage is as strong as ever.”
“I’ve been through a lot.”
“For once, it may help us in the short term.”
My eyes widened. “Never thought I’d hear you say that.”
“In the future,” she warned, “it will ruin you. We have much soul work to do. You are tainted, dear.” She stopped me in the middle of the path. “Anguish, anger, and vengeance have their claws buried deep into your core. It will consume you if you choose to ignore them.”
My jaw clenched. “I’ll work on it.”
“Caring for our spirit is as important as taking care of our bodies. You feed yourself every day, do you not?” Her eyebrow arched.
“Yes.”
“Then you must do the same for your soul. We must learn to be in stillness, connect with the ancestors and spirit that lives all around us, in nature.” She reached up to touch a bare branch. “Everything has a spiritual heartbeat. Out here, we can talk about what happened. Words, Winter, can be poison if we do not let them out. Please.”
My arms shook. “I’m afraid.” I let the words leave my lips before I could stop them.
“That is perfectly normal,” she said, encouraging me. “It’s good to acknowledge it.”
I inhaled sharply. “They hurt me so much.”
She pulled me into her arms. “I know.”
“I don’t think I can be fixed.”
“Nothing is ever too broken to be fixed.” She moved back and placed her hand over her heart. “Nothing.”
“Then I will just have to have faith in you.”
She shook her head. “No, have faith in yourself.”
I veered off the path and walked into the forest. Narrowed trees branched up toward the cloudy sky. Snow crunched under my boots. “Moving on from this talk,” I said. “I’ve come to tell you Blaise has agreed to us using a nearby town to house our army. He will send guards to the border to search any who come through. I’ve decided to send for mercenaries. One of them is named Hawk. I believe we can reach them through a tavern at the seafront in Imperia. He and his men will come to our side if we offer the future queen’s undying loyalty once we win.”
“There are many who will come,” Morgana replied. “I can send word to others who are against Edgar’s rule. There are many lords who want him off the throne. They have their own men. If we can bring them all here, we can grow quickly.”
Fear pulsed through me. “Are you sure they’ll back me?”
