Page 146 of The Rebound
“I don’t know—how about telling me not to go?” I ask. “How about remembering that you’re in love with me. How about…” My hands go to my hips as frustrated tears prick my eyes. “I wouldn’t have minded,” I tell him, “if you wanted to beat up Tyler. I know that makes me a bad person, but I think I would have been flattered if I’m being honest. Maybe even a little turned on.”
“By me fighting your ex?”
“By you fighting forme! You just told me you loved me and now you’re like, oh, okay bye, have a nice life, Abby. If you don’t want me to be with anyone else, why is it so easy to just let me go?”
“Because it’s what you want.”
“But I also want you!”
“Then ask me to come with you!”
Oh.
We stare at each other, Luke looking more and more pissed off when I don’t say anything.
Oh.
“That’s what you wanted me to…?”
He shakes his head, turning to face the road as if he can’t bear to look to me.
“You want to come to Toronto with me?”
“I want you towantme to— Christ.” He rubs a hand down his face as if to wake himself up. The burn is blocking my throat now, and it takes a few swallows before I can speak.
“I didn’t think you’d… I mean, it’s so far and we’ve only been together a few… It’s nice,” I finish lamely. “I went with Jess once. The move can be a bit of a culture shock and it’s not cheap but there are lots of Irish people there. Clubs and bars and museums and…”
I shouldn’t have said it. Because as soon as I did, as soon as I let myself voice what I didn’t even know I desired, it became all I ever wanted. A picture of Luke and me in some new city where no one knows us. With the anonymity and the time to sort out whatever this is between us, to develop it together, to explore it together. Tobetogether.
“But your parents—”
“Are my parents,” he says, exasperated. “I love them but I don’t need to live five minutes down the road from them for the rest of my life.”
“Your exams—”
“Are finishing next month. The lease on the café is up in August. Beth already told me she’s thinking about not renewing. I could sell up. Get some cash.” His throat moves as he swallows. “I love you, Abby. And whatever this is between us, I’m all in.”
My heart does a painful leap and then starts to beat in double time. A horrible nervous hope rises in me. “You’ll go with me?”
“If you’ll have me.”
“Yes,” I say. “I’ll have you. I will definitely have you.”
He starts to smile. “Yeah?”
“Think of all the injured ice hockey players you can help.”
His smile widens and my tears fall freely then, which seems to amuse him greatly.
“I’m fine,” I say as he moves toward me. “I don’t know why I’m crying. I’m fine.”
“Don’t tell me you were hoping I’d say no.” His arms envelop me and I close my eyes, the pit in my stomach lessening as pulls me into an embrace. I cling to him, soaking his thin cotton T-shirt but he doesn’t seem to mind.
“These are happy tears,” I tell him.
“I know.”
“I’m very happy.”
