Page 76 of Top Shelf
“Here.” Reaching into my bag, I pulled out a handful of little amigurumi—a koala, a button quail with a wide-brimmed hat, an otter with stubby legs, and a little mushroom.
Cosmo took them all, studied them, then gave Eli the mushroom before curling his hands around the rest. “You been anxious lately?”
I shrugged. “Yes and no. It’s easy to forget about everything else I have to do coming up. But then Quinn brings up going to the arena so he can get paperwork done, or he brings me to one of his sled hockey practices and…” I trailed off with a shrug.
Cosmo gave me a look of understanding. “Does it feel weird? Being done with it all but not being done with life and shit.”
“My little philosopher,” Eli said.
Cosmo gave him a look, then kissed him again.
For only a moment, I let myself wonder what their relationship was like. This very obvious love. It was a verydifferent kind of love from what I had with Quinn or what Colton had with Myles.
“Have you talked to Colton lately?”
Cosmo dragged his gaze away from Eli after a beat. “He and Myles are insufferable. Probably like you and Quinn, except you never bring him around.”
“You can come visit when my mom is here,” I told them both. “She doesn’t know about us yet.”
His eyes widened. “Dude. You still haven’t told your mom?”
“I know she really loves him. I mean, she did when she was here. But…” I twisted my hands together, trailing off. “I won’t give him up, but I also don’t want her to hate me. Or him.”
“Dude.” Cosmo rolled his eyes again. “I’m pretty sure your mom doesn’t hate anyone, like, ever.”
That was absolutely not true, but he also didn’t know my mom other than the sweet auntie who made sure everyone was warm and fed. Though I was pretty sure it would be fine. Like…eighty-nine percent sure. Okay, maybe seventy-two percent sure.
“Breathe,” Eli said, sounding a lot more relaxed than Cosmo. “I think once she sees you two together, she’ll get it.”
“She’ll be angry at first, I think. He’s older than me and so much more experienced.”
“Yeah, but it’s not like he’s taking advantage of you. If she doesn’t see it right away, she will.”
Nodding, I tried to ignore the pit in my stomach. I wanted to believe them both. It was just hard because I knew how it looked. I knew how he looked. I knew that my mom still thought I was easy to manipulate and control. I didn’t know how to convince her I was more than her assumptions of me.
My phone buzzed in my pocket, and I flew out of my seat. “I have to go. See you later.”
On my dash away from the table, I could hear Cosmo say, “You know he loves us because of how many animals he made for us.”
Part of me wanted to turn around and reassure them both, but the bigger part of me knew that Quinn was waiting for me at the curb, and I really, really wanted a kiss.
I found Quinn’s car after a second, and I saw him smiling at me through the windshield. My ankle twinged a little as I hurtled toward the passenger side, but it was easy to ignore as I yanked on the handle and climbed in.
Quinn had been in St. Louis for training, and though he was only gone a week, it felt like a year.
“You smell like you showered,” I said as I yanked him close and attached my lips to his.
He hummed into the kiss, touching my tongue with his before forcing me back. “I knew the airport smell would bother you.”
“I love you. Like, a lot.”
He laughed and kissed me again. “I know. Now, are you ready to go home, or do you want me to park so we can go back and visit with your friends for a bit.”
“Uhg, no. They’re just going to keep making out, and I really want to have sex.”
He burst into surprised laughter. He did that sometimes, usually when I didn’t use my social filter, which I didn’t very often. Especially with him. Curling a finger under my chin, he studied my face, then kissed me one last time before putting the car in drive and pulling out onto the road.
“So. Your mom.”
