Finally, in August, they packed up the Toyota with bedding and
clothes, and Xander"s graduation gift from Andi and Jed, a complete set
of luggage.
“We know you"ll be leaving, sweetie,” Andi had said then, tearing
up because that"s what she did, “but you need to know that you"ll always
have a home with us. You never have to live out of a garbage bag again,
okay?”
Xander had nodded, speechless, and hugged her, and he hugged her
the same way as they were leaving. He had seen his mother, on occasion,
as she wandered through the neighborhood, high, or drunk, often with a
different man shouting at her to hurry. He could barely remember a time
when he had felt anything for her but fear and disgust. One night, not
long after he"d come to live with Chris"s family, Andi had heard him
crying, and when she"d sat by the head of the couch and stroked back his
hair, she asked him why.
I"m a terrible person. I don"t deserve to be here.
You"re a sweet boy. Tell me what you think you"ve done wrong.
The Locker Room
49
Shouldn"t I at least miss her? She was a good mom, once. She used
to feed me and stuff.
Andi"s hands had stilled on his hair.She deserted you, Xander. The
part that you should miss, she died, and you"ve mourned her and lived
without her. The part that"s left, that part doesn"t know you, and you
have the right to walk away.
The luggage had the Edwards"s family address printed on it. The
message was clear. He and Chris might have beengoingaway, but he
wasn"twalkingaway. He had a home. He had a family. And Andi was
right. He wasn"t going to live out of a garbage bag ever again.
Both of them had been hugged fiercely by Andi, and Jed, and even