Page 183 of The Locker Room

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desirable. Not to him.

Xander nodded. “Yeah.”

“Xander, if I ask you a question, do you promise not to kick me out

of this really nice fucking house?”

Xander sighed. “If I answer you do I have to make you sign a

confidentiality agreement to not blab the frickin" answer all over the

whole entire world?”

Mandy"s eyes got big, and then she nodded and pursed her lips.

“You"re really worried I"d do that? You like… totally saved my life

tonight?”

“Mandy, this is our lives we"re talking about. Everything we love

to do in the world depends on only a handful of people knowing.” That

158 Amy Lane

sounded so dire, didn"t it? The weight of not telling the world seemed to

press in on him like that damned box.

“Okay,” she said softly, and she came to sit on the bed. “So now

let"s say I know too. You going to tell me what the bad dream was

about?”

Xander shook his head and laid his cheek on his knees. “You heard

that?” he asked, embarrassed. He wondered if Penny had heard it too.

“You were screaming, Xander.”

“I don"t usually get that loud when—”

“When Chris is with you?” she asked delicately, and he nodded,

still clutching himself into a little ball.

“Can I rub your back, Xander? "Kay? Because, you know, you

gave me a hug and comforted me, and I have to admit, I got all starry-

eyed for a minute, and thought „Oh hell, yeah—he"s way better than

whatsisface with the lump on his skull", but you know? You were just

hugging me to be a good guy. It almost means more now. I"d like to

return the favor.”

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