Page 232 of The Locker Room

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seen it.

“I really do love you kids, you know it? I"ve seen my share of

athletes fuck themselves up, just like Chris, but I don"t know if I"ve ever

seen anyone as fucked up as you are, standing by his side.”

Xander looked away, feeling helpless. “Without Chris, I"m not

anything,” he said, meaning it.

Leo breathed out, hard, the kind of breath that meant he was closer

to something more painful. “You just keep telling yourself that, Xander.

None of us here are buying. I mean, we"re all here for Chris, right? But

being here for Chris is also being here for you. And like it or not,

Cochise, you"re going to have to make a serious decision in four days,

you hear me? Because however he"s doing by then, you will either have

to leave his side or give some plausible explanation as to why you won"t,

and that"s going to be all you.”

Xander tripped over the bench on the front lawn and literally went

down hard on his knees and face-planted onto the lawn.

Leo, bless his black little heart, laughed so hard that he sat down,

even as Xander picked himself up, not even hoping for dignity.

“Surprised you there, didn"t I, chief?”

The Locker Room 201

Xander nodded, rolling his eyes as he brushed himself off. “I"ll

play,” he said, not even sure he said it. “I"ll come out this season—don"t

doubt it. But Chris… he can"t play. He"ll never play again. He"s going to

live… I"m going to trust that he"ll live because I can"t think beyond it,

right? But I can play. HowdareI not do it, when Chris loves to watch

me play?”

Leo"s smirk went slack and open, and his eyes went wide, and he

shook his head. “Xander, it"s a good thing you weren"t some sort of

Cossack general, back in the day. You get that tone of voice, that look on

your face, and I"m not kidding… evenIwould follow you into hell.”

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