Page 49 of Constantly Cotton
“Not soon enough.” Jason held on to his hand but pulled it away from his face so Cotton could sit down next to him. “I was sitting here like a big jealous turd, watching you guys play down there. Not fair, I know. Medina’s a good guy, and I don’t think he swings our way, but still.” He shook his head. “I wanted to be out there in the lake with you.”
The throbbing in Cotton’s groin grew into an ache.
“I wanted you to be,” he said gruffly. “Medina doesn’t do it for me, Jason. Not even a little. Briggs doesn’t do it for me. Daniels doesn’t. My roommates have been one-and-doned, and they’ve probably forgotten it even happened.”
“I want to be betternow,” Jason muttered. “But I think I’ve got two more days of naps in me before I so much as try to walk around the lake.”
“Then let’s get you into bed so you can nap,” Cotton said practically. It was his turn to bring Jason’s knuckles to his lips, wanting to savor every second they got. “We’ll call it foreplay.”
Jason laughed softly, but he didn’t argue, and together they made their way inside.
Big Splashes
THREE DAYSafter being forced to watch as Cotton jumped into the lake with the charming—and decked—Christopher Medina by his side, Jason was trying hard not to bounce on his toes.
“I’m ready, right?” he asked, positively giddy. “No fever since yesterday, my wounds are all clean and spiffy. We can go walking, right?”
Cotton gave him an exasperated look. “I told you, I’m texting Lance!” he said, laughing.
Jason could admit it; he’d been exhausted when he’d left the desert and probably at death’s door for some of the last three weeks. But he’d been on the mend before they’d come to the mountains, and now, four days after arriving, he feltso good. It was like his body was remembering how to function when he wasn’t always sick and sad. Good food, lots of sleep, and yes, antibiotics and painkillers that he was pretty religious about taking—as well as some vitamins that Burton had brought out of sheer hope, Jason figured—had begun to work some serious magic.
Yeah, he could still feel the lingering effects of illness. He didn’t anticipate being able to hike around the lake and then swim in it for an hour, as Cotton had been doing over the last days, but oh please, could he hike on the path a little? Seeing the clear blue sky from the porch had been wonderful, but he wanted dust on his shoes and sweat down his back.Cleansweat, not sickly fever sweat. He was finally remembering what it was like to function above 70 percent, and he wantedmore.
Cotton closed the medical kit—which Jason had to admit he kept antiseptically clean and organized—and tucked it under the bathroom sink. As he stood up, his pocket buzzed, and he looked at it and smiled.
“Your physician has cleared you for ashortwalk, Colonel Constance,” he said pertly, a playful smile on his face, and Jason, excited and emboldened, ducked in and stole a kiss. Cotton grinned at him, comfortable and happy, and held a finger up to his lips.
“Are we anticipating somethingelse?” he asked archly.
Jason couldn’t help it—he giggled. “Yes?” Oh, he was hoping, so hoping. They had kissed in bed each night, like teenagers, their kisses growing bolder and more comfortable and passionate. Their hands had wandered, and while the paths had grown a little more familiar, they’d also grown exciting. So far they hadn’t really done anything that would be considered untoward at a high school prom, but those moments, holding Cotton, tasting him, feeling his own body surging back to life, not just after his wound and his illness but after the long period of dormancy, was a pure, sweet, sugar-adrenaline thrill.
“Mmmmeeebe…,” Cotton teased, biting his lip, and Jason snuck another kiss before turning toward the bedroom.
“Stop being so cute!” he begged. “I really want to get out of here for a little while!” Watching Cotton grow in confidence these last four days had almost been worth the wait. Jason had worried so much about taking advantage of a younger man, about being too old and too worn, and hell, about knowing better.
But sex didn’t scare Cotton. Sex had been a commodity, a trade he’d made for food and shelter and even to an extent, for self-respect. What Jason had been offering him over the last few days—even the last week—had been kindness. Warmth. Physical intimacy without expectation.
And Cotton had blossomed into his arms, playing, smiling, teasing. And while Jason was pretty sure sex was going to be spectacular forhimbecause he hadn’t had it in so long, he was starting to hope that it would be wonderful for Cotton, because Jason didn’t think he’d gotten a lot of sex that came with intimacy. Or without trade.
Jason was starting to hope that their touching was as special for Cotton as it was for him, and it wassoamazing for him.
“Cute?” Cotton egged on now. “You think I’m cute? I’ll have you know, I was billed as a power top.”
Jason snorted as he bent down and pulled his socks on.
“No, seriously!” Cotton grinned. “I was the Dickinator. I saw a P-spot and destroyed it!”
Jason had to straighten up in the middle of tying his brand-new tennis shoe. “No, seriously?”
“You don’t think I can top?” Cotton asked, eyes still twinkling.
“Well, yes, probably,” Jason said, aware he was treading on thin ice. He shrugged sheepishly. “I just… I don’t know. I kind of have fantasies about taking care of you. Is that bad? I mean, I know you can take care of yourself in bed. You had sex for a living. I’m sure you’ve got some tricks. It’s just….” He took a breath, thinking about it. “I just… I feel like you need someone to hold your heart in their hands like it’s precious. That sex is a place where you can have that. I mean, sometimes, yes, you’re looking for Dickinator, destroyer of assholes, but sometimes….” He looked at Cotton hopefully, wanting the younger man to understand what he wanted and that he didn’t want it to be a threat to Cotton’s independence.
“Sometimes you want to be cherished,” Cotton said in surprise. He sat heavily on the bed, close enough that their arms touched. “Is that what you want to do with me?”
Jason couldn’t be sure if he was uncertain or excited about the prospect. “Is that so bad?” he asked, searching that angel’s face.
He was only a little surprised—but oh-so-gratified—when Cotton kissed him, voraciously, taking all of their practice over the last few days and perfecting it, driving him into the bed and taking his mouth happily, again and again, while Jason ran his hands under Cotton’s shirt and drank in the smooth skin of his back and down below his waistband, kneading the sweetly giving muscles in his ass.
