Page 53 of Karma Kitty Christmas
But no selfishness. No callow insistence on his own way. No pouting because everything in Isaac’s life didnotrevolve around him. And the emotional openness to say, “I wanted to do something nice for you,” as opposed to, “That’s not appropriate, Isaac. We need to do it this way.”
There was no talk of Allegra moving somewhere after she had the baby. There might be eventually. Isaac knew that someday Allegra might find a partner who would deserve her and love her baby like his own—but not now.
Between May and October, they had become a functional little family, with visits from grandparents Isaac had already loved and plans for a baby,in his house, that Isaac couldn’t wait to love.
And a man in his bed that he loved with such sweetness, such purity, he was afraid every morning to wake up and find it was a dream.
So far it had been very, very real—right down to Luca and Allegra pitching in the money for the housekeeping and gardening services because they appreciated them too.
Isaac had only given in on that becausethey’dfelt they should help, not because he wanted them to be one iota different than they were. After living for ten years in an emotional desert, he’d been gifted this amazing house. The transaction hadn’t been his intention—when he’d first fallen in love with Todd, he would have lived with him in a shitty apartment or a hovel in the woods. But the things that had made Todd broken emotionally had also made him good with money, and Isaac found that sharing that with people he could laugh with, play with,lovewith, gave him a sort of balance, drew things full circle….
Made him no longer hate the memory of the first man he’d ever loved.
He was absolutely sure Todd wouldn’t have approved of a thing Isaac had done since that evening in May when he’d refused to finish that damned brown sweater, but now Isaac could say, in all honesty, that what Todd approved of—or disapproved of—was no longer a driving force in his life.
That alone was like being freed from a prison in his own heart.
But that didn’t mean he was sure about what to do that night in mid-October.
He and Allegra had spent one of their yarn Saturdays decorating the front yard for Halloween. (The neighbors two doors down kept trying to get him to call it “Jesusween,” and not only did he refuse, he hadn’t been able to tell Luca about it because he was afraid Lucawoulddecorate for “Jesusween,” and then they’d all be going to hell.) The giant fruitless mulberry tree in his front yard had turned mostly yellow but hadn’t dropped its leaves yet, and the weather, which had been in the hundreds in late September, had dropped to the low eighties and was actually crisp in the mornings. Putting big monster masks on the front door and along the window sills had been incredibly joyful for the two of them, and hearing Luca’s big laugh as he entered the house from the back had lightened the house every bit as much as the smell of the pumpkin spice candles that Isaac promised Allegra would be the first thing to go once her emerging beachball got legs and became mobile.
So that had been a happy moment—and so had the moment Allegra told him that her birthday was the week before Halloween. He’d been working on a bolero-style sweater—one that would warm her arms but leave her beachball uncovered and unfettered, andalsowould fit her next year. Something that would comfort against the overzealous air conditioning thatLuca’s office seemed to emit in the mornings but wouldn’t be too hot as the day got warmer. It was in a bright magenta, becauseAllegrawas so vibrant and happy (as well as dark-eyed and dark-haired, so the color would lookamazingon her) and crocheted in a series of shells and flower-like stitches that just shouted joy.
But Allegra and Luca hadn’tseemedhappy. In fact, something had been looming over them, a sour cloud, and now that Isaac’s schedule wasn’t spinning like a roulette wheel and he had his feet under him again schoolwise, he felt like they needed to tell him what was going down.
He wanted to do his part of the emotional support, dammit—they’d both been pretty awesome at it forhim.
So on Thursday, because school got out a little earlier that day and he didn’t have any meetings to fill the time, he went shopping for some pork chops, which he threw in marinade as soon as he got home. By the time Luca and Allegra got home, both of them acting like they’d rather slog through bitter snows to an icy hovel in the heart of Minsk than take one more step into the kitchen, he had one of his best pork chop recipes simmering, along with rice and a tossed salad.
And a layered pudding dessert in the fridge.
Oh yeah. He knew their weaknesses by now. He had no compunction about using their love of good food against them.
Luca and Allegra tried really hard to keep things light and happy during dinner, but when Isaac broke out the pudding dessert, both of them looked like they were going to cry.
“Oh my God!” he said, setting down a whopping big dish of the stuff in front of each of them. “If you two don’t tell me what’s going on, I’m stealing the rest of this and putting it in the staff room!”
“Don’t you dare!” Allegra ordered, her mouth full as she demolished her first bite. She, at least, looked like SnowWhite after she’d been revived by the prince’s kiss or a magic potion or something. Her eyes were sparkling, and her posture straightened, but her brother was not that easy.
He sat slumped over his dessert, staring at it like it was water but he wasn’t allowed to drink.
Isaac went to him and wrapped his arms around Luca’s shoulders. “Come on, baby,” he murmured. “You can tell me. It’s what I’mherefor.”
Luca let out a sigh and seemed to grow a little smaller. “Allegra and I sort of—”
“We don’t have to do it,” Allegra said after swallowing another bite. “It was a stupid deadline. We don’t have to—”
Luca straightened, leaned his cheek against Isaac’s, and smiled sadly. “Baby, we have to. I mean… they mightnottalk to me. But what if you could have Mom in your life? What if you could have grandparents for the baby? You haven’t said anything, not once, but….”
“But I have Roxy,” she said with dignity. “And Grandma. And Isaac.” She took another bite of pudding. “And this stuff, which may have spoiled me for all other desserts.” She gave Isaac a watery smile. “Seriously, Isaac—I can’t believe you haven’t served this earlier.”
“It’s got so many calories,” Isaac told her. “I save it for big deals. I was going to serve the banana kind for your birthday, but….” His smile went a little soggy. “You were both so, so stressed. Tell me what you’re thinking about doing?”
“We were going to visit our parents,” Luca said softly. “For closure. To know they weren’t an option. And also to… to….”
“To say neener, neener, neener, we have lives and they’re not in them,” Allegra admitted, staring at the last bit of pudding in her bowl. “How many calories?” she asked wistfully.
“None,” Isaac told her, taking the bowl and adding another piece of the layered dessert. “No calories. Absolutely guilt-free.”
