Page 75 of Crumbling Truth
He only shook his head and turned away, like he couldn’t bear to look at me, and I was suddenly transported back to the soulless condo I’d shared with my husband, to a life of alternating silence and screaming rage.
God, I felt like I was going to be sick.
I stumbled away from Theo’s side, my boots sliding across an unsalted patch of ice at the edge of the driveway. Alex stepped forward to help me, but I gave a tiny shake of my head, so he dropped his hand to his side.
“I have to go,” I said numbly as I hurried toward the guest house.
Memories bombarded me, nuances of expression and tone that had ruled my entire life for those years with Steve, drowning out the sound of Theo calling my name.
Behind me, Alex said, “What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“Are you trying to save her from me?” Theo’s hoarse demand cracked through the night like a whip. “To take her from me?”
Too much. It was all too much.
I needed to escape, to burn away the suffocating emotions clawing their way up my throat. Between the clunky boots and all the layers of snow gear, I couldn’t move fast enough.
“She’s a human being, you asshole, not some contest to win. You think the second you turned your back, I swooped in to seduce her? For fuck’s sake, man. Even if you think that little ofme,I can’t believe you’d think that of her,” Alex continued, his voice vibrating with rage on my behalf.
Even that was more than I could bear.
I’d left a backpack of clothes at the main house, along with my spare EpiPen, but I sure as hell wasn’t going back in there with Theo right now. God, I couldn’t even stand to look back toward the two of them, squaring off at the edge of the driveway.
It took me impossibly long to tear off my gloves and fumble through my pocket for my key, but I finally got the door open, went inside, and slammed it behind me.
There on the floor lay a red envelope with my name written in scrolling silver marker. I picked it up and slid my finger under the flap, more for something to do with my hands than because I was desperate to know what was inside.
It was one of those photo collage cards from Alex’s girlfriend, Isabelle, featuring pictures of herself and her toddler, plus one of Alex with his arms wrapped around them both. On the back, she’d added a handwritten note, thanking me again for answering her allergy questions via email.
A choked laugh tore from my throat. All this drama over a silly Christmas card.
I set it aside, peeled off my layers of soaked outerwear, and flung them all to the floor. The curtains were blessedly closed, so I didn’t have to risk looking out at the two men who were probably still standing outside arguing. I started the electric teakettle on my countertop and then dropped down into a chair, covering my face with my hands.
Forty-eight hours. Theo had been gone for two days, and he thought I’d cheated on him with his brother during that time? I hadn’t even moved that fast with Theo. Or did he think we’dbeen conspiring against him all along, whispering behind his back? I would’ve laughed if I hadn’t been so close to tears.
I heard a truck engine start and then slowly fade to silence, presumably as Alex got the hell away from his brother’s Jekyll and Hyde act. A few seconds later, there was a soft knock at the door. I let my hands fall but didn’t stand.
“Esther, I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry,” Theo called.
To his credit, he sounded so utterly ashamed of himself that I almost wavered and opened the door for him. Then another surge of nausea swept over me as I remembered him turning his face away, like he couldn’t bear to look at me. I fled to the bedroom where I could no longer hear his apologies and sat at the edge of the bed, but memories of him haunted me until I wanted to weep.
My chest felt hollow, like my heart had been carved from my body and the gaping hole filled with sawdust. I stared down at my hands, clenched together in my lap, and waited until the kettle started whistling to force myself to stand.
When I returned to the kitchen, I put a bag of herbal tea in a mug, poured the water to steep, and finally went over to the front door. Through the peephole, I saw Theo’s profile, his head hanging down in abject misery.
If I spoke to him right now, I would hurt him. I wanted to lash out, to cause him the same pain that streaked through me, twisting my insides into knots. I would say something cruel, because I was still horrified that he would think so little of me when I’d already started tipping over the edge into the dangerous territory of loving him.
I pressed my fist to my mouth to stifle a sob as I backed slowly away from the door, away from the sight of him.
Who was I kidding? I was already in love with Theo Silver.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Theo
Itwaslikeascene from a horror movie, replaying over and over in my mind. Alex’s indignant fury on Esther’s behalf, the look in her beautiful moonlight eyes as her trust in me shattered into a thousand pieces.
What the hell was wrong with me?
