Page 21 of Crumbling Truth
I fought the urge to grip that rough palm with my own, to let his warmth envelop me against the cold, and forced myself to push the door open instead. “Thank you for your help today, and for dinner.”
“You’re very welcome. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
With a nod, I closed the door behind me, but I couldn’t stop myself from leaning back against it as I tried to slow my whirling thoughts. Then, silently, I turned around and peeked through the peephole.
Theo had started turning as though to walk back to the main house, his hands tucked into his pockets again, but his head was tilted back as he gazed up at the night sky. Though his features were somewhat distorted by the tiny bubble of glass, his expression appeared utterly serene, almost blissful.
For longer than I cared to admit, I watched him with one eye, trying to soak up some of the peace he exuded. After he finally lowered his head, shook himself loose from whatever reverie he’d been lost in, and headed toward his parents’ house, I took a single step away from the door, then another.
“He’s only a man,” I whispered.
It wasn’t as fantastic a reassurance as I might have hoped.
Halfadozentimesduring the following day, I considered backing out of dinner with Sofia’s crew. Mystomach had tied itself into knots so tight I thought I might vomit. By mid-afternoon, I was on the verge of hyperventilating.
My phone rang twice as I got dressed, each time from an unlisted number, but both calls ended without a word on the other end.
Before Theo arrived at half past five, I’d stress-baked two separate batches of brownies, frosted a dozen of my favorite Mississippi Mud cupcakes, and downed several antacids in an attempt to settle my stomach. The guest house smelled amazing and I couldn’t even appreciate it in my current state of agitation.
Theo, however, looked like he was ready to propose marriage again when I opened the door for him.
“Sweet mother of Christ, what is that heavenly aroma?” he asked, closing his eyes on a deep inhalation. When he opened them, the radiant smile on his face slowly untangled the tension in my gut.
“Dessert,” I answered, taking the time to look him over.
Instead of his usual lumberjack chic, he wore dark pants and a gray dress shirt. His hair was still damp from a shower, curling around his collar, and I was fairly certain he’d trimmed his beard. I wondered if it was as silky as it looked.
“You look stunning, Esther.”
I flushed. “Thank you. You clean up pretty well yourself.”
Despite the frequent college outings Sofia dragged me to, eyes had always been drawn to her, not me. Even Steve had expressed his interest with restraint—after all, it wasn’t my body he wanted, but someone to subjugate. I wasn’t used to being scoped out or ogled.
Theo’s slow, appreciative perusal knocked the breath clear out of my lungs.
I’d chosen a black dress that flared from the waist to swish just above my knees, black tights, and low-heeled ankle boots. The dress had long sleeves but a plunging neckline that revealedfar more skin than anything else in my closet. Theo didn’t let his gaze linger, though, just lifted it back to my face and smiled warmly. I grabbed my coat from the hook by the door in a frantic attempt to keep from babbling.
“Ready?” he asked, offering his arm.
I nodded and slipped my hand through the crook of his elbow. “Ready as I’ll ever be.”
The temperature had been steadily dropping and the air smelled like that first frigid whiff of snow. I drew a deep breath, savoring the pristine newness of it, and Theo shot me an amused glance. In response, I shrugged and watched my breath crystallize in the night.
“I like the cold, is that a crime?”
Theo tilted his head back and forth, like he was considering it. “No, I just didn’t realize you were such a weirdo.”
I sputtered indignantly. “I am not a weirdo!”
He winked at me as he opened the passenger door of his pickup. “I suppose you’ll just have to prove it, Esther.”
“Hmph.” I bit back a smile when he climbed into the driver’s seat. “Remind me again why we’re doing this?”
One hand froze on the gear shift as he turned to look at me, his eyes glittering black in the darkness. I might appreciate certain aspects of winter, but the early sunsets were not among them. Theo seemed to be searching my expression for something.
“It’s not too late to change your mind,” he said finally. When I opened my mouth to reiterate my threat from the previous evening, he held up his hand to stop me. “I trust you to know what you want, Esther, but I’d hate for you to feel like you should do this just because logic says it will work in our favor. We can show up as friends or neighbors or whatever makes you more comfortable, and I’ll tell them all to back the hell off. I just want you to know I’ve got your back, however you want to proceed.”
It shouldn’t have surprised me that a man raised by Anita and Lou would be as kind and perceptive as he was attractive. I nodded slowly as I let that observation sink in.
