Page 59 of The Sea Siren of Broadwater Bottom
He pulled a sharp right, reined Bucephalus in, and vaulted off before his horse had even come to a full stop.
Bucephalus gave him a strange look, then wandered over to the stream for a drink.
Elissa was so absorbed in whatever she was reading, she gave no sign of noticing him. He plopped down beside her on the brown plaid blanket she had spread out on the grass. “I didn’t really want you to leave.”
Her whole body jerked, and a characteristic look of befuddlement crossed her features. “Edward?” she said, sitting halfway up.
He was breathing hard, and he knew he should apologize for having startled her, for having told her to go away that morning, for being covered in mud and smelling of horse, for having in the past twenty-four hours issued not one but two of the worst proposals in the history of mankind… for an alarmingly long list of offenses, now that he thought on it.
He knew what he should say, but every time he tried to speak, the words died in his throat. He was in agony waiting for her to get her bearings. To give him some indication of where he stood.
And then, she did it.
She smiled at him as she pushed her way up to sitting. It was her real smile, as if she were delighted to see him (how was that possible?). “I’m so glad you’re here,” she exclaimed, laying aside her book.
“You—you are?” He gave a furtive glance around, half-expecting to find someone else, the person to whom she was speaking, sitting beside him on the blanket, but there was only Bucephalus grazing nearby.
“Of course.” He noticed then that she had removed her bonnet, gloves, and half-boots, which were arranged neatly along the edge of the blanket. There was also a tea towel covered in crumbs with two biscuits on it.
His stomach gave a great rumble, reminding him that he hadn’t eaten since breakfast.
“Are you hungry?” she asked as she tucked her stockinged feet beneath her.
“I am,” he confessed. “I’ve been out riding ever since we parted.”
“Perfect!” She reached into her leather satchel, which he now recalled was both ‘all of her luggage,’ and also a reasonable receptacle for a book, a blanket, and a picnic luncheon. She pulled out a canteen and a large tea towel that had been tied into a bundle. “I asked the kitchen to pack something for me. Wait until you see how much they sent!” She laughed as she picked at the knot. “I thought it excessive at the time, but now that you’re here, it feels fortuitous.”
His stomach growled again as two rolls and a wedge of cheese came rolling out of the bundle. Elissa handed him a roll and quickly sliced him some of the cheese. “Oh! And you’ll be wanting some lemonade,” she said, passing him the canteen.
He devoured the roll in three bites, which earned him a giggle. She hastened to unpack the rest of the food. He felt so grateful upon being handed a chicken and leek hand pie he could’ve kissed her stockinged toes. While he ate the pie, she carefully applied butter and jam to the second roll, then went to work peeling him an orange.
The worst of his hunger sated, Elissa cheerfully helped him remove his boots, “So you’ll be more comfortable.” She was just sokind. Edward was accustomed to being the one who looked after everyone else, the one no one thought to assist. And he knew this was his own doing. He was the one who rigidly maintained an image of self-sufficiency at all times. But considering the way his heart lurched as Elissa smiled up at him, proffering her orange slices, perhaps there was something to be said for letting this particular woman take care of him sometimes, too.
By the time he polished off the slice of pound cake Elissa presented for dessert, his stomach was feeling significantly better.
The rest of him was feeling relieved, as Elissa was rather obviously not furious with him, but also a bit stupid. Because clearly he had overreacted that morning.
She brushed a few crumbs of pound cake into the grass, then settled on the blanket facing him. She took his hands in both of hers. “So… I wasn’t leaving.”
“I see that now,” he said, gesturing toward the blanket with an elbow, “although it would be my fault if you were.”
Oh, how he wanted to close his eyes, to stare off across the field. But he forced himself to meet her gaze as he said, “I am very sorry for what I said this morning. I shouldn’t have told you to go away. I thought I meant it at the time, but as soon as I heard you’d left, I realized I’d made a horrible mistake.” He swallowed. “I handled the conversation in the worst way imaginable, and for that, I am truly sorry.”
She ran her thumb over the back of his hand. “It’s all right, Edward. I’ve been thinking about it all morning, and the thought I keep coming back to is that when I saw your medals, all I could see was an opportunity I would have loved to have had, but was always denied.” She bit her lip. “But that’s not what they represent toyou. Is it?”
She understood. She understood perfectly.
The thought made him queasy. “That’s correct.”
“For you, they represent not something you wanted to do, but something you felt youhadto do. Do I have the right of it?”
“It became that, by the end.” He cleared his throat. “As you saw this morning, I am not at my best when discussing the Chancellor’s Classical Medal. But if you can find it within yourself to grant me another chance, I promise I will never mention it again.”
One corner of her mouth quirked up. “Never mention it again? I believe we should take the opposite approach.”
Sweat broke out on his temples. “I disagree. Strongly.”
“And yet, after this morning, I do feel that I deserve an explanation. Especially if there is to be any discussion of our marrying. How can I properly consider your offer if I don’t understand you, Edward?”
