Page 14 of A Very Roguish Boxing Day
Tom hadn’t been able to summon the wherewithal to answer, although his brother had more or less summed up his own thoughts.It was a mistake.It had to be, right?Everyone knew Gracie was his girl.
But why didn’t she say something?The whole point of the banns was to speak now if there was a problem.Why didn’t Gracie gasp, press a hand to her heart, and cry, “Oh, dear, Mr.Cartwright—I think you must’ve said my name by mistake.”
Instead, she just sat there, silent as a church mouse.Tom could see her pretty golden head a few rows in front of him as she sat there unmoving, shoulders stiff.
After a minute, Neil jabbed him in the ribs.“Did you know about this?”
“No.”Tom’s voice sounded hollow to his own ears.“No, I…” He couldn’t seem to get any more words out.
Neil’s hand had clasped his shoulder.“It’s all right.It’ll be all right, you hear?Breathe.”
After church, Tom had wanted to speak to Gracie, but Neil had stayed him.“Not here,” his brother muttered.“Don’t make a scene in front of the whole town.”
And so that evening, he had waited outside the Three Cups Inn where she worked.When she came outside, he stepped out of the shadows, blocking her path.
“Tom!”Her voice held not only a note of surprise but of admonishment.“You startled me.What are you doing here?”
“What do you think I’m doing here?”he asked, voice hoarse.
She had the grace to look uncomfortable.“You heard what the priest said.”
“I did,” he acknowledged, nodding.“But I didn’t understand it.I thought we were going to marry, just as soon as I had enough saved up.”
She sighed.“I suppose I should’ve said something a long time ago.I just thought it was obvious.”
Now he felt fucking stupid.“Thought what was obvious?”
Her voice turned mocking.“You’re going to go to London?You think you’re going to make your livingboxing?What do you think’s going to happen—you’re going to be the heavyweight champion?”She laughed spitefully.“There are a thousand men who say that every year.How many of them do you think succeed?”
He held his voice as even as he could.“I know the odds are stacked against me.I said I’d look for work as a smith after a couple of years if things don’t pan out.I have aplan, Gracie.”
She lifted her chin.“Well, it was always a daft plan, at best.And that was before Richard Everett proposed.”Pity crept into her eyes.“You couldn’t expect me to turn down a chance like that, Tom.He’ll inherit his father’s farm one day!You’re the type of man a girl likes for a roll in the hay.But he’s the kind you marry.”
Tom bowed his head.He didn’t say anything more.He just turned and left.
He didn’t need to hear more after that.
He’d left for London the next morning.In the end, it had been a blessing in disguise.After all, who’d ever heard of a boxer without a chip on his shoulder, without something to prove?Every time he’d wanted to quit, every time he’d wanted to take his aching body home instead of training for one more hour, he’d heard Gracie’s mocking voice in his ear.You think you’re going to make your living boxing?What do you think’s going to happen—you’re going to be the heavyweight champion?
He fucking did, and he fucking had.He’d boxed angry those first few years, rising up the ranks and earning a reputation for his punishing training schedule as much as his punishing right hook.
But in the end, Gracie had been right, hadn’t she?Not that he couldn’t support hernow.He made a damn good living now, while he was in his prime.Maybe even as much as that priggish husband of hers who was twice her age and didn’t know what to do with his tongue.At least, that was what he’d gathered the first time he’d gone back to town, when Gracie had tried to pick up where they’d left off.He’d had to clench his jaw not to say something nasty, something designed to hurt her, like asking if she really thought she could compare to all the women he’d fucked in London.
He thought his eyes had probably conveyed the message well enough if the way she shrank back was any indication.He’d stood there, saying nothing, and she eventually cleared her throat and walked away.
It had been satisfying in the moment.But the truth was, his body was already starting to break, and he would be worthless in a few short years.
He’d been a bad bet all along.Gracie had just seen it before he had.
“Tom?Tom?”
Gwen’s voice recalled him to the room at the Pulteney.To his new life as a soon-to-be-down-and-out boxer.
“Sorry,” he said, shaking his head, which only made the ringing in his ears worse.“You were saying?”
Gwen’s blue eyes blinked behind her spectacles.“Are you ready to proceed?”
“I am.”
