Page 39 of One Bed for the Bluestocking
The next day, Nathaniel was feeling confused.
The good news was that it appeared he was going to have a good long while to contemplate the strange state of affairs that had arisen between him and Kit.This was on account of it being Sunday.When Mr.MacRitchie had suggested that he and Kit might like to join his family for Sunday services, Nat had readily agreed.He was given to understand that religious services were strictly observed in the Outer Hebrides, and he wanted to put his best foot forward.Besides, he attended church regularly.It wasn’t as if it were any hardship.
That was before he realized that the service would be in Gaelic.Really, he should have anticipated that one.Well, no matter.That wasn’t the real problem.
The real problem was that he’d been sitting beside Kit on the pew for five hours.And, as best he could tell, the service was nowhere close to ending.
This left him with nothing better to do than quietly contemplate the baffling situation that had arisen between him and his illustrator.
After three consecutive nights of erotic dreams, followed by three consecutive mornings of awakening to find that he had seized Kit in his sleep and was engaged in some combination of caressing, groaning, and humping, he could not plausibly deny his attraction toward Kit.
It was surprising because Nathaniel had never had this sort of reaction to another man before.Not that he found such a response troubling, in spite of the prevailing opinion that sexual attraction between two males was immoral.
One of the primary supporting arguments for this stance had been posed by a series of clerics dating back to Thomas Aquinas.Sexual acts between men were unnatural, Aquinas had argued, because they did not occur in the natural world.
But Aquinas had been wrong about that.Nathaniel would know.He was a naturalist, after all, and had therefore had occasion to observe males mating with other males in a range of animal species.Anyone who had spent time around sheep could tell you that rams mounted other rams all the time.Additionally, there had been a recent uproar in the German publicationEntomologische Zeitungafter zoologist August Kelch described male doodlebugs having sexual relations with other male doodlebugs.He had promptly been denounced by his fellow entomologists, only for his detractors to conduct their own observations and discover that he had been right.
Whether it was ducks or dolphins, goats or geese, mating occurred between members of the same species, regardless of what Thomas Aquinas said.These animals were God’s creations.As they exhibited this behavior, there was nothing “unnatural” about it.Any other conclusion was blatantly illogical.
Nathaniel was therefore not alarmed to discover his undeniable attraction to Kit.But was at a loss as to explain why Kit inspired such a reaction.He could not help but observe that Kit smelled unusually good.Which, he had to admit, was a piss poor excuse for humping him in his sleep!But it was almost as if the young artist emitted some sort of natural musk that Nathaniel found nigh irresistible.
What made Nathaniel feel even more uneasy was the fact that his unintentional advances were apparently not reciprocated.Although… it was difficult to be sure.There were times when Nat felt certain that Kit was experiencing a similar state of arousal.He had awoken yesterday to find that Kit was the one humping him.The young man’s cheeks were always flushed in the morning, and his voice breathy.Why, just this morning, Kit had been clinging to him so tightly, he had scratch marks on his shoulder!
But there was one thing Nathaniel could not help but notice, and that was that while Nat woke with a raging erection, Kit was never in a similar state.And wasn’t that the most conclusive piece of evidence?Perhaps he had misinterpreted the signs that Kit reciprocated his feelings.Maybe his red cheeks were a sign not of lust, but embarrassment.Perhaps he had dug his nails into Nat’s shoulder not to draw him close but as an act of self-defense.
Perhaps it was all a figment of his imagination…
The congregation stood as a hymn began.The church did not have an organ to accompany the singing.Nor was there a bell in the steeple, or any stained glass in the windows.When Nathaniel had asked about it, Mr.MacRitchie had solemnly explained that such ostentations were frowned upon on the islands.Nathaniel was surprised by this definition of “ostentations,” but he certainly preferred the islander’s simple sincerity to the alternative—extravagant spending on decoration without any discernable piety.
He caught Kit’s eye, and the young man gave him a commiserating smile.The one bright spot was that Kit seemed as determined as Nathaniel was to close the door on whatever madness was flaring between them within the confines of their room.There was no awkwardness between them as they worked together.In fact, there was an ease to spending his days with Kit that Nat had never experienced before.Usually, the things he wanted to do—spend all day sitting in a field, staring at an animal or bird—his friends and family could tolerate for no more than five minutes.Likewise, the topics that were of interest to him were deemed dull by most everyone he knew.
With Kit, it was the opposite.There was nothing the young man would rather do than spend all day watching puffins, and nothing he would rather discuss over dinner that night than what they had observed.Every detail was of interest, no matter how minute.It was nice to find someone who truly enjoyed his conversation and wasn’t just humoring him.
It felt rare.Special.Precious, even.And it moved him in a way he had not anticipated.His feelings for Kit were growing deeper with each passing day.What he felt for the young man was so much more than the incendiary physical reaction he experienced when they shared the same bed.
Kit was hispartner.His soul mate.Nat was growing more certain of that fact with every day he spent in his company.
How that would translate in a world in which it was a capital crime for two men to express such feelings physically, he did not know.
But they could be close friends.Confidants.Research partners.
Perhaps that would be enough.
Chapter18
They had hoped that Mr.MacIvor, the man who was to take them to the far side of the island, would return from delivering his load of lobsters on Monday, but he was nowhere to be found.Kate was there when Nathaniel asked Mr.MacRitchie about it.The innkeeper responded with a shrug.“He’ll get here when he gets here, I suppose.”
Fortunately, Murdo had a never-ending supply of interesting places to take them near Stornoway, so they spent their days agreeably occupied observing merlins and oystercatchers, red deer and dolphins while waiting for Mr.MacIvor to grace them with his presence.
He finally arrived in port on Wednesday night, and so their departure was fixed for Thursday.Mr.MacRitchie supplied them with wool blankets, sacks of oats and potatoes, and barrels of smoked fish.Although Murdo had shown them a few local plants they could forage for, it appeared there would not be a great deal of variety in their diet for the next few weeks.
Paradoxically, Kate welcomed the challenging conditions.She had always longed for the chance to prove herself, to demonstrate that she was capable of performing just as well in the field as a male illustrator.She’d been secretly thrilled when Nathaniel had allowed her to row the boat into shore.That was precisely the sort of task she had never been allowed to perform as a woman, and although she wasn’t as strong a rower as Nathaniel, she had proven equal to the task.
As she readied herself for bed on Wednesday night, she vowed that she would prove equal to the task that was to come.
It took them most of the day to sail around the northern tip of the island to another beautiful, white-sand beach.This time, mountains loomed in the distance.
Mr.MacIvor ferried them to shore and directed them to one of the summer shelters, called a shieling, that dotted the island.They would spend the night here, then the next day, they would make the hike to Loch Raonasgail.
