Page 16 of Introducing Mrs. Collins
‘From our acquaintance thus far, Mrs Collins, I know I need not simplify. But, for the sake of a pleasant conversation, I will say only that things are improving, and we have reason to be hopeful.’ He had plastered a tight grin on his face.
‘You need not be brief, sir. I would like to understand more, if you are willing to tell me. You can be explicit.’
The colonel took a deep breath. ‘Why then – it is true that things are better. The deadlock we have had for so long has been broken, thanks to Wellington. In January, he laid siege to a very important city that opened up the route from Portugal. This already makes all future endeavours easier – or, possible – to attempt. My men say, “When Wellington fights, he wins,” and so far, it is true. In battle, in action, he is a marvel.’
‘Were you led by him, in – at the battle you mentioned when we first met?’
‘No.’ Fitzwilliam took a sip of his drink and paused for a moment. ‘I wish we had been. We were led by Beresford, who… He was immensely brave, but the whole thing was – a shocking mess. The worst the army has seen since the start of it all. We lost thousands,thousandsof men. It was – I will not be explicit, Mrs Collins. I would not wish it on you.’ He pushed his hair away from his face roughly.
‘Andyou… you lost many – friends?’ Charlotte asked delicately.
Fitzwilliam’s face was hardened, very different from his usual easy countenance. ‘Yes. Many.’ He took another large sip. ‘One in particular. But also, many. I must – find a place to put it. I cannot have them at the forefront of my thoughts while I am’ – he gave a bitter smile – ‘sipping tea with my aunt or making morning visits. I would be rough company indeed.’
‘It is easier when you are sipping brandy, perhaps?’ Charlotte said. She had not meant it as a jibe, but it had an effect on him.
‘Yes, I – excuse me.’ He rose and walked away.
She thought she had truly offended him and that he would leave the room. But just as she was panicking, he returned, having left his glass on the table in the corner.
‘You observe me well, Mrs Collins.’
‘I did not mean—’
‘No, I know, but it is a concern of mine. I used to drink a good deal more, and in the months after our – after Albuera, I leant on it very heavily indeed. I was not in good shape and not fit for company. I should be more careful now and not slip back into…’
Charlotte looked at his downcast eyes, how his hand twitched a little with nothing to occupy it.
‘I cannot know what you have endured, sir. But from the little you have said, it is only natural that you would need something in the way of comfort.’
He looked up and met her eyes, which looked on him with compassion.
‘Thank you,’ he said. ‘But that comfort, in the end, has not been good for me; until recently, under its influence, I was not a pleasure to others or to myself.’
‘I see. What brought on a change?’
‘Darcy.’ Fitzwilliam raised a smile and straightened himself subconsciously. ‘He has known me since infancy and recognised the poor state I was in. He had seen that path trodden by anothermember of his family and knew it could not be tolerated. He was strict with me, even brutal, and it was the best thing anyone has ever done for me.’
Charlotte nodded. ‘It is a very good thing, to have such friends – friends who care enough to be harsh.’
‘It is. Have you such a friend? Is Miss Bennet such a one?’
Charlotte thought for a moment of how Elizabeth had railed at her for her accepting Mr Collins. Was that Elizabeth showing care for her character, protection of her future? She supposed it was. ‘Yes. She is.’
‘Then we are both blessed. I walked with Miss Bennet this afternoon in fact.’
Charlotte sensed that he wished to change the subject and also noted an odd pang of jealousy within her. ‘Oh. Was she well?’ asked Charlotte. ‘She has had a headache since she returned.’
The colonel looked concerned. ‘Well, yes, she seemed a little out of sorts when I left her. I am sorry it is worse.’
Charlotte waited for him to ask more about Elizabeth, but he did not.
A moment later, the front door was heard opening and shutting, and loud footsteps clattered in the hall
‘Is that you, Darcy?’ called out Lady Catherine. ‘Pray, come and join us; you are very late indeed.’
There was no immediate response to this; the footsteps had quietened.
‘DARCY!’ repeated Lady Catherine, and then to the room, ‘I am sure it is him.’
