Page 27 of A Heart of Crimson Flames
She gaped at me, and I winked back.
“But first—we drink!”
Calla
“WE WOULD GET THERE FASTER IN OUR FURS,” I MUTTERED, staring at the silvery moon illuminating the carriage curtains.
Grae let out a long-suffering sigh. “We are not running in our furs alone with five Ice Wolves,” he repeated again.
“What if we stick close to the soldiers?”
“You and I both know the second you are on all four paws, you will be shooting off faster than they can keep pace with.”
I gave him a mirroring frown, tracing the crease of his forehead with my finger. “I don’t necessarily know that.”
“Your lupine drive to run at the head of the pack could be used against us,” he countered. “It could be an ambush; it could be a trick to lure us away from the palace and slaughter us. We are not going anywhere without enough guards to take on whatever tricks they might have up their sleeve.”
“I don’t think they are fooling us,” I said, even though I knew it was naive to trust them. “I think Verena needs us just as badly as she says. I think she would make a good ally for the future.”
Grae’s mouth tightened, and I already heard all his arguments before he even said them. I knew he was right. Knew it was illogical to go chasing after my sister at the cost of everything else. I was a ruler. It was important I didn’t put myself in harm’s way or make an already difficult time worse for my court, and yetsomething hotheaded and wild came through me when it came to my family. I would do the most foolish things in the world if it meant saving them.
Grae folded his arms and leaned back against the bench across from mine. Our slow convoy of carriages trailed through the Sevelde Forest.
“Maez will keep her safe,” Grae said, already knowing the fear in my mind.
My throat bobbed. “We don’t know that.”
“We do.” He nodded and I didn’t know if this display of confidence was to comfort me or because he really believed it, but Gods did I need his calm reassurance. “The skies could fall and the mountains erupt and the seas boil, but Maez would never hurt Briar even if her heart has rotted to ash.”
“I cannot imagine it,” I murmured. “Losing a mate.”
Grae leaned forward and took my hand in his own, linking our fingers together as he swept his thumb over the back of my hand. “Nor I.” He lifted my hand and kissed it. “When we go, we go together, to whatever end.”
“To whatever end,” I echoed, staring back out the window as if I could see Damrienn all the way from here.
I felt the war brewing like it was building in my body, the urgency making my heart beat faster, my mind race quicker. If Verena spoke true, we could attack from the north with the Ice Wolves in tow and Sadie and the Songkeepers’ monsters from the south. We could circle around Highwick, take the castle, kill Nero... and then what? What would happen to Damrienn then?
Grae’s hand squeezed mine, making my gaze drift back to his. “Do you want to run through it again?”
A sad smile crossed my lips. Of course he knew that I was running through every possible scenario and eventuality, knew I needed to talk through a plan for every outcome. We ran it again and again, dissecting each way our plans could go awry, every “what if?” And still my mate knew I needed to talk it through again.
“I love you,” I said instead of “yes.”
A surprised smile ghosted his lips. “I love you, too, little fox.” He kept smoothing those soothing circles over the back of my hand. “I have faith in us, too. From the very moment I met you all those years ago in the forests of Allesdale, Calla,” he said, “I knew you would make my life an adventure.” He fiddled with my engagement ring—the protection stone he’d once given me as a necklace when we were still kids. I knew seeing it on my finger still brought him comfort. “We’ve been through impossible straits before and come out the other side unscathed.” He lifted his other hand, fingertips trailing the golden scar down my collarbone. “Well, mostly unscathed. I don’t think I will ever truly shake the image of you lying on that floor from my mind.” Grae’s haunted eyes lingered on my face. “Which is why I won’t let you run off with some half-baked plans. My soul couldn’t take it.”
I leaned forward, resting my forearms on my knees in mirror to Grae. “Together. We’ll get Briar. We’ll ally with the Ice Wolves. We’ll kill Nero. And we’ll rule Olmdere until we’re very, very old, surrounded by two dozen of our brave and cunning grandchildren.” Grae chuckled as I tried to will those words into existence. “What?”
He toyed with my ring again. “I’m going to hold you to that, little fox.”
Briar
THE SHIMMERING CRYSTALLINE NIGHT WHORLED WITH MYsteaming breath as I huddled beneath my new fur cloak. I wondered how many lives would pay for it.
It took me hours to draft my letter to Calla. I kept getting choked up writing it, as if putting ink to paper would finally resign myself to the fact that it was true: Maez was a sorceress. And she still wanted me, in her own way; I knew from that look in her eyes she did. But did that make it any better? She had no reason for a mate, but she’d keep me as a lover? Would I bed her while I watched her kill and slaughter to keep our stolen castle warm? Was this the life I resigned myself to if I stayed by her side?
I hadn’t shared all those fears with Calla, but I knew my twin would be thinking them all the same. Calla had always been too perceptive for me to keep any secrets from them. I wondered if they would hate me for it, choosing to stay with someone who was by all accounts now evil. Sometimes I thought my twin put me on too high a pedestal. Sometimes it seemed like they saw me as the personification of good. How would that idealized version of me compare to this—someone willing to love a killer? Someone who was beginning to realize she carried her own darkness?
When I’d given the letter to Maez, she’d flicked her wrist and the letter had disappeared. She said she left it on Calla’s bedsidetable. My anxieties eased at that. At least Calla would know I was safe.
