Page 28 of A Heart of Crimson Flames
Maez cleared her throat, pulling me from my thoughts and back to the frozen balcony. She appeared without even opening the door and I was beginning to suspect she was always around, lurking in the shadows, ready to be summoned.
“These aren’t the furs I expected you in on the full moon,” she mused, ambling over and leaning on the railing to survey the moonlit tundra.
I’d felt the pull of the full moon like the heavy undertow of a mighty wave. I’d walked almost mindlessly out to the balcony to gaze up at the Moon Goddess.
“Doesn’t the Goddess call to you still?” I asked Maez. “Doesn’t she pull you out of your skin to run in the moonlight and howl at her beautiful glow?”
“I am beholden to no magic now,” Maez said, pride in her voice. “No Goddess can control me.” Her eyes dropped from the sky onto me. “Nor person.”
“Is that what you thought I was to you?” I silently cursed myself for being unable to hide the pain lancing my words. “Was I a shackle? You thought I controlled you?”
“You put a target on my back the moment the moonlight touched me,” Maez said, her bright magic even more vibrant in the dark. “I’d finally found my place, my safety as a guard for Grae. You plucked me out from those shadows and brought the eyes of all of Aotreas upon me.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat. I hadn’t really considered what a burden it would be to be tied to the Crimson Princess. To be mated to someone that everyone wanted for their own gains. Within hours of our bonding, Maez had suffered for it.
“I’m sorry Sawyn took you to keep me cursed.” I said it like I hadn’t a hundred times before. I’d forever feel guilty for what Maez endured at Sawyn’s hands while I was under that sleeping curse. Weeks and weeks she was starved and tortured before Calla and Grae saved her.
I scrutinized her with new eyes.
“What?” Maez asked, seeing instantly the flash of a question on my face. I hated that she could read me just as easily as ever even when I couldn’t do the same.
“Nothing,” I said, shaking my head.
“No,” she corrected. “Say it.”
“I only wondered...” I took a deep breath and blew it out, the steam curling like pipe smoke. “I wondered if all that you suffered at Sawyn’s hands was one of the reasons you grabbed for that dark magic in Valta.” Maez went stock-still. “When you heard that I’d been taken, had it been out of fear that I would bear the same fate as you?”
“So close and yet so far.” Maez chuckled and I shuddered at the bitterness in her laugh.
“Tell me.”
“Like I said”—her eyes darted back to the moon—“no one controls me anymore.”
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, voice cracking. “I’m sorry I brought all of this upon you. I’m sorry I am who I am, my own kind of curse.”
My hand slid across the balcony to cover her own and Maez instantly yanked it away.
“Oh bleeding heart Briar,” she scoffed. “Save your apologies. I’ve never felt more free.”
Tears welled in my eyes. I knew she’d chosen the darkness because of me, to save me, knew the old Maez would stop at nothing to get me back. But now that the magic had taken hold of her, I knew she wouldn’t make such sacrifices again.
When I sniffed, Maez glanced at me and rolled her eyes in annoyance. “Go,” she said. “Run in the moonlight. Pray to any Gods that control you.”
She turned and I reached out, without thought, my hand landing on her forearm. “Wait.” Maez paused and looked down to where my hand touched her flowing black robes. “Come with me.” I knew she was going to make another sniping comment,knew she’d make another jibe about control, so I switched tack. “Can you even shift anymore? Or did you lose that power for a different one?”
“I can shift,” Maez said defensively, and I knew I had her hooked.
I quirked a brow at her. “Do you think you’re faster than me now?”
“Without question.”
“Prove it,” I challenged. “You run this pack. Lead the way; show me the land of your new domain.”
Oh, she liked that. Her lips curved into a catlike grin. Perhaps I could find a way to work my charms over this version of her, too, goad her into spending time with me, growing closer again. I asked her to lead the way, a fun, distracting game of cat and mouse, but really my heart was screaming out to her. Maybe the run would put a dent in her newfound armor. This was one step in the right direction, and I had to try.
I bowed my head to her and gestured to the door. “After you.”
She let out a little huff. “Are you sure you can keep up?”
