Page 56 of Not Today, Satan
He pulls back, and darkness clouds his eyes. “Ah. There it is.”
Shivers run up my spine, not only because it’s cooler out now, but at his change in demeanor. “There what is?”
Leaning against the wall, he focuses on the horizon. “I knew you had another reason for breaking me out. You’ve never believed I’m innocent. What was the plan? Have me help you find your mom, then send a message to dear old Daddy to come get me so that he forgives you?”
Heat rushes up my neck, and my mouth runs dry.
Crap.Showing him that picture was a mistake.
“I…” I open my mouth and close it again. My shoulders drop. “Yes, that was my original plan. But to be fair, I didn’t know you yet. You were a sinner who was gullible enough to believe I’d want to free him.”
Hurt blazes across his features and his jaw tightens. “And now?”
“Now… Now I’m not sure.” The words take even me by surprise. I’ve never considered letting him go once we’re on Earth. But I also didn’t fully believe he was innocent—until now. I turn to him, cross-legged, my knees pressed into his thighs, mirroring his earlier position. “I didn’t see your sin when I touched you that night in my room. You’re sincere when you talk about Gabe. And you’ve saved me multiple times now. Honestly, I don’t know what my plan is anymore.”
The only sounds are the motor of the boat and the water sloshing against the sides of it. They may as well be my own stomach contents tossing around as I wait for his answer.
If he tells me he’d rather go back to his lot than take a chance with me, I couldn’t blame him. He knows two dangerous things about me: the lies I’ve told him, and that my father istheking of lies. It doesn’t make me an easy person to trust.
He takes a few deep breaths, then faces me, his jaw softening. “While ‘I may send you back to Hell but I’m not sure yet’ isn’t exactly what a guy wants to hear, I appreciate the honesty. And no matter what you decide to do, I’ll try to help you find your mom.”
I raise my eyebrows in surprise. “Really? Why would you do that when I’ve admitted I’ll probably betray you?”
“Two reasons.” He takes my hand, his skin soft, fingers gentle as they curve around mine. “The first is because I know what it’s like to not to be with your family. You deserve to meet your mom. The second is that when you said you don’t feel like you belong down here, I agree. The person who freaked out at her reflection in Lot Eleven was fighting the monster she was afraid she’d become. So was the girl who carried me across a bridge. I’ve seen your pain when the damned scream. You hurt because they do. I don’t think you can harm an innocent person. And I know I’m innocent. By the time we find your mom, you’ll know it, too.”
I pull my hand from his and drop it into my lap, scanning the floor. The person he’s describing can’t be me. It’s everything Father’s trained me not to be. How can there be good in me when I’ve spent my life surrounded by everything that’s evil?
Tears spring to my eyes, and I blink them away. “I can’t make any promises.”
“I’m not asking for any.” He touches my knee. “And I think I can help you. In fact, IknowI can. You said all the pics your dad had were taken in the same place?”
“Yes.” I pull out the photo and hand it to him again, still unable to meet his eyes. “She’s always sitting on that bench.”
“She probably lives nearby,” he says. “I know this park. It’s popular with the locals.”
My heart picks up speed, and I lift my head. Scooting so my knees are tucked beneath his, I peer at the picture. “You do?”
“Yeah, it’s down the street from one of my foster homes. I’ve lived all over the L.A. area, so I know it like the back of my hand. See the building behind her that says ‘Fiesta Hall’ on that wall? It’s an event venue. I worked there one summer.Somany weddings. I can take you there if you like.”
I scrutinize his face, searching for anything treacherous beneath that tanned skin and those bright eyes. “You’d really do that for me?”
“Yes, Devica.” He hands me the photo, and I place it back in my bodice. “It’s not like I have parents of my own to find. On Earth, I’d probably end up back in the foster system. Where everyone thinks I’m dead.” He pushes off the floor and walks to the front of the boat, his gaze focused on the horizon. “Damn, I really hadn’t thought any of this through. What am I doing? I have no one left. I don’t know why I’m fighting so hard to get back there.”
My heart aches at his words. When we started this journey, I was sure we had the same endgame of wanting out of here and that was where our similarities ended.
It turns out we do desire the same thing, but it’s not freedom. It’s connection. A person who cares about us without conditions. The one thing neither of us knows if we’ll find up there.
We just know we can’t get it down here.
Using the wall, I push myself off the floor and stand beside him at the helm, our shoulders touching. We stare at the water, our breaths rising and falling together, the tops of our fingers brushing. Electricity pulses through me at his touch.
His hand slips into mine. and my fingers tighten around his. For a moment, we’re alone, but together, and I no longer care how much farther we have to go.
A scream pierces the sky, echoing from one of the lots, and I drop his hand. Closing my eyes, I curl my fingers into fists so they’re no longer vulnerable to his. We can’t stay here. Father will track us down. And he may not throw me into the Ignis River because I’m his daughter, but Nate won’t receive the same mercy.
“Look.” I swallow the ache in my chest. “I appreciate your help finding my mom. If I don’t turn you in, you have to promise you’ll disappear. I’m your guide out of here and nothing more. It’ll be safer if we split up once I find her.”
Now that the light’s dropped away, it’s impossible again to make out his expression. He’s harder to read than Mr. B.’s handwriting. “Got it, Virgil.”
