Page 46 of The New Year's Party
“Why did you think I slept with Phelps?”
What?
“Because you went in there,” I say, “and then he went in there, and then he closed the door, and when I came out of the bathroom I heard, you know...breathing.”
Olivia’s forehead wrinkles and she presses on a spot above her left eyebrow. “That’s it? You heard breathing?”
“And a long—” Ugh, I don’t want to relive this! It’s gross. And sad. “A groan, okay? I heard Phelps groan in...that way.And I was thinking about going in or whatever and making sure you were okay, but then he came out, and he was readjusting his belt, and I saw you in the bed behind him with your legs... splayed open.” I mime the position of her legs, which is burned into my brain. There. Is that what she wants?
Olivia nods slowly, but she doesn’t look reassured. She looks even more disturbed.
“Can I be honest?” Her voice is low and throaty.
“Of course,” I say shortly. “Honesty is the only way.”
“I...” Her eyes go distant and her head turns back to the guys. To Phelps and Bennett, who are laughing their butts off about something on Phelps’s phone. Are they evenfocusedon troubleshooting the problem with the game anymore? “I don’tactually remember having sex. I... I guess when I came out of the room and you told me you couldn’t believe what I’d done and kind of... stormed off or whatever...”
“I’m sorry, are you upset withme?” Isn’t this just like this group. Doing their horrible deeds and then making someone else the bad guy. Of course I was upset when Olivia cheated on Bennett and I was the witness. Was I supposed to have no emotional reaction?
“No, no, I... Sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up. It’s just—” She glances at me, then away, like she can’t bear to look at me for too long or she’ll burn herself. Like someone running their finger through a candle. “Did you... happen to tell Bennett?”
“Excuseme?” I say. My heartbeat is rocketing. I hate this dynamic. These accusations from the very people who are the ones messing everything up. First Ted. Now Olivia. “Why would I want to be in the middle of any of these messes?”
“Someone did,” she says in a hurt, retreating way, and her eyes go vague again.
“Well...” I huff out an irritated breath. “It’s not like we were alone in the house.” I pause to scratch my chin. “Actually, now that I think about it... Doug went into the hall bathroom after me. Those doors are paper thin, so... he probably heard me say it.” I reach out as if to touch her arm but don’t make contact. “Oh, gosh. Mr. Loose Lips himself. I’m really sorry if I...”
“It’s fine,” says Olivia, crossing her arms tightly over her body, her eyes flashing up to Doug.
We stand there as Phelps lines up the shot glasses in a small patch of snow and pours tequila in. Ah. The plate problem is solved. They’re now wedged between the plastic planks on top of the table, just like I knew they should be all along.
I look sidelong at Olivia. Not a shining moral beacon, that’s for sure... but I think she feels some kind of bond with me.Or at least she knows I have one on her. She could be a potential ally.
“Hey, so... on the subject of marriage, Will and I aren’t doing so well, actually,” I say. Might as well take the plunge before the shooting starts and our moment is gone.
“What?” Olivia’s long pale hand flies to her chest. She looks utterly shocked.
I shake my head. “Yeah, we—”
Shattering glass makes me jump a little. Ah. Doug just shot off the gun. It’s a miracle he didn’t hit the other guys from behind. Olivia releases a nervous laugh.
“Not yet, Doug, damn it!” shouts Phelps. Ted has his arm around Bunny and they’re both laughing. “Someone take that gun away from Doug!”
“Dude, put it down,” Bennett is saying. “Here, hand it over.”
Doug struggles with Bennett. “No, I’ve got it, I was just checking to see if it was loaded, I didn’t mean to fire—”
“Let go of the weapon, man!” shouts Phelps.
“Anyway,” I say in a hushed voice, actually grateful for the distraction so I can sneak in this moment with Olivia, “Will is... He has some big problems. He refuses to see a counselor.”
It feels strange to say this. I’ve told the elders. I’ve told my parents. I’ve even secretly emailed Will’s parents. But I haven’t exactly shared this widely.
“I’m sorry...” Olivia laughs awkwardly. “Your Facebook posts are always just so... I mean, I guess I shouldn’t have assumed. It just all looks so perfect.”
“I mean, itisperfect. Except for the elephant in the room. You know?” I purse my lips.
“Is he... depressed?” hazards Olivia.
