Page 10 of Starchaser
She nods, her expression suddenly serious. “Agreed.”
The weight of Margaret’s revelation settles on my shoulders. But then it lifts, and I feel lighter than I have in months. If Margaret has joined the Order of Hildegarde, then I don’t have to keep my involvement a secret from my sister any longer. At least I’ll have one sibling I can talk to.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner,” I say quietly.
She waves her hand. “You couldn’t have. Before…” She lets outa low sigh, and I understand the words she hasn’t said:before Father died. “I wouldn’t have listened to you. I would have said no.”
“But now?”
Her eyes flash, fire and rage and bitter grief alight in her blue gaze. “This has to end.”
For a moment, all I can do is stare at her—at my sister, the warrior. And in this instant, everything feels possible. With someone like Margaret in the Order, things can be different now. We might actually have a chance.
This has to end. But when does it end? When the king and queen are dead? When Morana has been captured? Even if we succeed, could it really be that simple? Could we end six hundred years of war and hatred?
“Jack knew you’d be furious,” Margaret says, a grin tugging at her lips. Mischief sparks in her eyes. “He’s expecting your worst.”
I snort. “He couldn’t handle my worst.”
We both break into laughter, the two of us falling back onto the cot beside each other. We exhale at the same time, the brief moment of reprieve gone as quickly as it came.
We sit up, leaning in as we did when we were children and we would huddle in her hammock, sharing secrets or dreaming about things we thought we could never have. I realize, with a pang in my chest, that during the time we spent living together at Bludgrave, we rarely even spoke to each other. Margaret was starting a new life, and I was holding tightly to the one we left behind.
“So,” Margaret whispers, “what really happened then? Did you see him?”
“Who? Captain Shade?” I lift my shoulder and bite my bottom lip, attempting to give myself time to think of a response. “No,” Isay carefully, using a half-truth to mask the lie. “He never visited me onboard his ship.”
“You were on hisship?” she nearly squeals. “What was it like?”
“Like a ship.”
She rolls her eyes. “You know what I mean.”
I drum my fingers on my pantleg, pretending to be contemplative. “It was…” I consider lying, but, “Oh, Marge, it was just as the legends say. His crew was rightly terrifying, and the ship… theStarchaseris mysterious, and fantastical, and unlike anything you’ve ever seen before.”
Margaret’s eyes widen with wonder. “That’s…” She frowns. “That’s terribly sad.”
The wordwhyalmost leaves my lips before I realize what she means. “Yes,” I agree, my voice cracking. I’ve just learned that my sister is privy to the secret I’ve been keeping—about my allegiance to the Order of Hildegarde, and now, her own—but already I cannot tell her the truth of Captain Shade’s false identity, much less his false death. Another secret. Another lie. “It’s awful.”
We remain silent for a long while. Then Margaret takes my hand.
“There’s something else you should know. The king sent his men to Bludgrave,” she says quietly, her gaze searching mine. She bites her bottom lip, as if unsure whether to continue. “They are considering Lewis and Charlie for military service. They said they might be required to join the League of Seven.”
I jump to my feet, my heart nearly leaping out of my chest at the idea of my brothers being forced to join the fight against the Underlings. Jack told me all about the League of Seven, and while the seven kingdoms of the Known World have joined together tobattle Morana’s forces, they see their human conscripts as little more than cannon fodder. “They can’t! Will would never let—”
Margaret stands slowly, her gentle movement causing the words to catch in my throat. She gives me a sympathetic look. “Lord William thinks it might be the Crown’s way of ensuringyouact accordingly,” she tells me.
I clench my teeth so hard I fear they might break. I fearImight break.
“This is all my fault,” I say, pressing the heels of my palms to my forehead.
Margaret places a soft hand on my shoulder. “Jack said the Order asked that you keep an eye on the prince the night of the ball. How could you have said no?”
I let out a low, hollow sigh. “I had a choice,” I say. “I chose to do it because I thought—at the time…”
Understanding flickers in Margaret’s eyes. “You were going to try to kill the prince.” She nods slowly. “I can’t say I blame you.”
My stomach lurches. “Why do you say that?”
