Page 89 of Save Us
“What does your gut say?” I ask cautiously.
James has been looking for a buyer for weeks, but Fiona Green is the first of them he’s wanted to meet in person. Beaufort’s was his mum’s whole life, and I think the pressure of finding the right person to take it on is weighing on him more than he’d like to admit.
“My gut tells me that I shouldn’t wait too long over it,” he replies.
“My gran always says your gut instinct is the most important thing when you’ve got an important decision to make,” says Lin, and Ember nods in agreement.
“You need to click, or she’s not the right person.”
“I hardly ever just click,” James replies. “I need to take time to get to know a person properly—more than just the first impression, I mean. But I’m meeting her again next Tuesday. Maybe it’ll be easier to decide after that.”
“Sounds good,” says Ember. She picks up the cardboard unicorn. “And if you need any advice, you can ask Ernie here anytime—in the strictest of confidence.”
James’s lips twitch. “Good to know.”
“We’re done here, right?” asks Lin.
“Yep,” I reply, looking at the floor. “We’ve got more than enough.”
She lifts her arms over her head and stretches. Then she sticks her legs out and reaches over to grab on to her feet. I hear something in her back creak alarmingly, and my eyes widen.
“I love that you’re doing all this for Lydia,” James says, and as our eyes meet, his smile changes slightly. It’s more open. Warmer. A touch more familiar. It’s a smile that’s meant only for me, one that’s full of secrets that only the two of us know. The longer he looks at me, the more my throat dries out. And the warmer I feel.
With jittery hands, I start piling up the cardboard cutouts. I’m sitting in my childhood bedroom with my little sister. I can’t start thinking about James’s naked body now.
“Shall we go down?” Ember asks suddenly. “Dad just messaged.” She holds up her phone to show us. The next moment, I see another text come in. But before I can see who it’s from, Ember’s turned her phone away. Her expression darkens. She shuts off the phone and pushes herself up from the floor.
As Lin and James walk to the door, I grab my sister’s arm for a moment. “You can always talk to me, Ember,” I whisper. “Always. You know that, don’t you?”
She looks at my hand, then up into my face. For a moment it’s like she’s wrestling with herself, but in the end, she shakes her head.
“Not about this, sis.”
Before I can reply, she’s following the others down the stairs.
23
Lydia
“You’re here!” I yell at James, Ruby, Ember, and Lin the moment I open the door. I grab James’s arm and drag him into the house; the others follow behind.
“That’s a nice way to say hello,” he replies, putting his arm around me. He gives me a quick squeeze, then his eyes wander down the hallway. He raises an eyebrow.
“Is that a…?”
“An oversize heart made of bright-colored roses? Yes, it is.” I turn to Ember, Lin, and Ruby and give them each a hug in turn.
“You look amazing, Lydia,” says Ember.
I stroke both hands over the soft fabric of my green shift dress that’s cut to really show off my bump, which in my opinion, really can’t possibly get any bigger now.
“I entirely agree with you,” says Graham’s voice as he comes to stand behind me.
I turn and smile at him. Then I reach for his hand and let my fingers intertwine with his.
I can’t describe how good it feels to be able to do that now—wherever we are and whoever can see us. We talked yesterday evening about whether it might be weird for my friends to see us like this, considering that he used to teach a lot of them, but we decided not to let it worry us. Graham is my boyfriend, the father of my children. I want to be able to touch him whenever and wherever I like.
As I turn back to the others and look into their faces, all I see is happiness and acceptance. None of them gives the impression that they’re fazed by seeing us holding hands.
