Page 27 of Save Us
He turns on his heel and marches across the office. His steps slow as he comes closer to me, and for a moment, I get the feeling he’d like to say something. But then he exhales loudly and leaves the office without another word. The door slams behind him.
I’m rooted to the spot.
Meanwhile, Dad takes the case off the desk and puts it back on the floor beside him, then turns to his computer.
Like nothing ever happened.
The anger is growing inside me, overwhelming me. I can’t hold it back any longer, and after what I’ve just seen, I don’t even want to.
Do you think he’ll ever change?Ruby’s words echo in my head.
I know the answer. I’ve always known it. I just didn’t want it to be true.
And suddenly, I understand what the fire inside me is all about.
I’ve spent years working my arse off to please my father. I just accepted the idea of a future that was all his. That ends now.
I don’t want to be the kind of man who gets his own way at all costs, who goes through life without a backward glance at the damage. I never thought I had a choice. But the last few monthshave shown me how unpredictable life is. They’ve shown me that there is something out there for me that’s worth fighting for. And they’ve woken something in me that I’ve never had before: courage.
The courage to do something for myself.
The courage to take control of my own life.
The courage to stand up to my father.
“That’s it.” I can hardly believe how calm I sound.
“What?” Dad says absently. He’s typing away, not even looking at me properly.
I stride across the office, a few steps bringing me to his desk. Now, finally, Dad looks up from his monitor.
I lift my hand to touch the signet ring on my left hand. The ring I wear to all Beaufort’s meetings. As a symbol of being part of this family. But all it really symbolizes is the united front that Dad and I fake to them all. It isn’t heavy, yet it feels as though I’m holding all the weight that’s been pressing down on me for the last eighteen years.
“I’ve tried, Dad,” I say. “I’ve really tried to be a good son. To make you and Mum proud. But…” I shake my head. Thinking of Mum is painful. I don’t know if she’d be disappointed in me if she could see me now, like this. “I can’t go on like this any longer.”
I put the ring down on the desk in front of Dad, not taking my eyes off his face.
“I’m going to sell my stake in Beaufort’s.” When I pull my hand away, I realize that I feel lighter than I have my whole life. As though a single gust of wind could blow me out of here, because I’ve put down everything that was binding me to this company and this man.
My father says nothing. The only hint that he is unhappy withthe situation comes from the bitter, downward curl of his lips. After a second or two, he turns back to his computer. I exhale and turn away.
“If you mean that, then don’t bother coming home,” Dad says quietly as I reach the door.
I glance over my shoulder at him. I remember my sister, and the fact that I’m probably blowing her last chance of getting back from Beckdale. I remember my mum’s smile. Everything that no longer exists in my life.
“What home?” I retort.
Without waiting for him to respond, I push open the door.
In this second, I know one thing for certain: This is the last time I’m ever walking through it.
8
Ember
All the way to Wren’s house, I feel watched.
Even though I know perfectly well that my fears are unfounded. Ruby’s in the tiny library at the other end of Gormsey, going over the notes that James and Lin have taken turns to drop off for her all week. Her route home won’t take her anywhere near this part of town. So I don’t need to worry.
