Page 55 of Feels Like the First Time
He groaned, and so did she. Unable to stop herself, she did it again, wrapping her fingers around his length, and taking her time to explore every hard inch of him. Slowly, she stroked and memorized, watching his every move and reaction. Watching her hand work him until she felt her own body tremble with need.
It was erotic, watching him watch her as she slowly drove him out of his mind.Sweet baby Jesus, he was as impressive as she’d imagined. Even more so. And her fingers must have been pretty impressive as well, because Hawk’s eyes rolled to the back of his head. His body arched in demand, while the muscles in his arms and neck corded tighter with every pass she made.
“Jesus,” he said, his breath nothing but a rush of air. “Sunshine, all that touching is going to make the next part impossible.”
“What’s the next part?” she asked, her hands giving no sign that she was going to slow down.
“The feel part.” He grabbed her wrists, stilling her. “And when I come this first time, I want to feel you tight around me.”
It happened so fast, she barely saw it coming. One moment she was straddling him, the next Hawk was sitting up on his knees, her ankles locked behind him, and he was lowering her down on her back, with his shirt beneath her for padding.
“And while I’m doing all of that feeling,” he said, pulling a condom from his back pocket and making short order of his pants, “I am going to be watching you, Aliana. Watching that body of yours come alive around me.”
His voice was gruff, but confident, and Ali trembled with anticipation. She didn’t like knowing people were watching her; she was always afraid they’d see all of her soft places, the vulnerable spots she kept hidden for fear of being hurt.
But she wanted to feel alive, wanted Hawk to find those spots, love away the hurt until she wasn’t afraid to be soft. Wasn’t afraid to show her true self.
But when Hawk slowly lowered himself into her, one careful hand beneath her head, the other around her back, protecting her from the ground beneath, Ali felt a helplessness rise up in her.
She didn’t know how to explain it, but she felt lost and found at the same time. She felt the past melt away, the uncertainty of tomorrow grow, and her need for Hawk spiral until all she felt was—
Too damn much, she thought, horrified.
Too much to process, to watch, and too damn much to lose. So she tugged him to her until she could wrap her arms around him. And Hawk was also a great listener when it came to the unspoken, because he tightened his hold and whispered, “I know, I feel it, too.”
And something about the slight tremor in his voice gave her the courage to feel it all.
Hawk felt the shift in her body and began to rock inside her. Slow withdraws and even slower thrusts, taking his time to build the rhythm, the trust—the connection.
A feeling she had been missing for some time now. And now that she’d found it again, she desperately wanted to cling to it with everything that she had.
“Stay with me,” Hawk said, picking up the pace, and giving her a kiss to end all kisses.
And as the pressure built, and Hawk worked her body into a frenzy, and her heart into a knot, she knew that staying with him wasn’t going to be the problem. Letting go was.
“God, you feel so…”Right? Perfect? Like mine?
Ali struggled to hear his words over her pounding heart, only he groaned before he could finish his sentence. Afraid she’d never find out, and not wanting to live with one more what-if, she cupped his face and said, “What, Hawk? What do I feel like?”
His smile was slow in coming, but soft around the edges. “You feel like sunshine.”
“Sunshine?” She gave a small laugh.
“Yeah, sunshine.” He kissed her again. “Sometimes it burns bright, sometimes it burns hot, but it has a healing warmth that I always wake up wanting to see.”
Ali felt her eyes tear up, because that was the most romantic thing anyone had ever said about her. Most people saw the hot side of Ali, but Hawk took the time to really see her for all that she was. And that, more than anything, got to her.
Afraid she’d do something embarrassing, like cry or blurt out that she loved him, Ali locked her legs around his hips and rose up, relieved when his eyes slid shut in ecstasy.
“Jesus, Ali,” he moaned, the need in his voice alone nearly sending her over the edge.
She lowered herself, and then tightened her legs again, the angles of their bodies pushing him deeper, farther. With a groan that said he was done playing, Hawk molded her to him as he crushed her between the ground and the even harder planes of his body.
His hands, however, stayed gentle, stealing Ali’s heart even more, while his lips gently brushed hers, over and over as the friction grew, and Ali’s body was once again screaming for release.
“Come on, sunshine,” he whispered. “Let go.”
I don’t want to let go. I want to hold on.
