Page 77 of Every Little Kiss
CHAPTER 15
“How many more sheriffs’ badges do we have left to paint?” Grace asked, wiping gold glitter off her fingers onto her apron. “I’m starting to see doubles of everything.”
Liv was having a hard time seeing anything past her upcoming date with Ford. It had been three days since their impromptu dinner turned dessert, and her body was still tingling. In fact, her whole world felt all tingly. Which accounted for the goofy grin she wore.
“At least you’re on paint duty. I’ve stabbed every finger twice.” Avery sucked on her pointer finger. “There is no safety in these pins.”
“There’s only one more box, and then we’re done,” Liv said, looking at the rows of drying sheriffs’ badges lining her kitchen counter. “The Stroller Patrol is taking care of the spurs for their feet, and Mr.Burns got us a deal on pink cowgirl hats for the girls.”
A few weeks ago, Liv hadn’t known even half of those people except in passing. Now she was making connections, building relationships, and spreading her wings.
And the stretch felt good.
She’d always been afraid that spreading her wings would require her to lose her footing. But the higher she flew, the more grounded she became.
She enjoyed working with the other mothers. Enjoyed being someone other people came to with questions. And she especially enjoyed how full her life was starting to feel. Not full to where it was hard to breathe like before. This kind of full had a lightness to it.
All she’d had to do was let go of some of the weight.
“What are those?” Grace asked.
“Eye masks for kids who want to be outlaws,” Liv said, finishing up the stitching on the eye mask and cutting the thread.
“Cute idea,” Avery said.
“It was all Paxton.” She held the mask up to her face. “He watchedThe Lone Rangerwith his grandma and said kids should be able to pick between being a sheriff and an outlaw.”
“I still can’t believe Carolyn blamed you for Sam’s death,” Grace said.
“She didn’t blame me,” Liv said, trying to ignore the hollow ache in her chest. She’d been trying to ignore it since her last conversation with Carolyn, without much luck. “She knew Sam and I were having problems. I mean, who shows up to their parents’ on Christmas Eve with their son and no wife?”
“People whose wives are nurses and drew the short straw to work Christmas Eve,” Avery said.
“I could have found someone to work my shift if I had wanted.” But she’d been more interested in making a point.
Sam had been working so many hours at the hospital that he was rarely home. He’d worked on Thanksgiving and was booked to work New Year’s, so when he agreed to assist in a surgery in Las Vegas on Christmas Eve, Liv drew the line. Told him something needed to change. That she missed him, missed their marriage.
And Paxton missed his dad.
He’d promised to put the family first and make a valid effort to be home for family dinners and important dates—and Liv believed him. Then the surgery was moved to Christmas Day, and he wanted Liv to change her schedule to go with him to see his parents on Christmas Eve.
She’d put her foot down. Told him to take Paxton to Sequoia Lake to celebrate with his parents, and they could do a quick present opening Christmas morning as a family before he flew down to Vegas. But when he got home, they would need to have to have a serious talk.
“Do you think that’s why she always rents a cottage instead of staying here?” Grace asked.
“I think she sold the house because it reminded her too much of Sam, and now it hurts for her to see how much the house has changed,” Liv said. “I just don’t know how to make her understand that by moving to Palm Beach, she’s missing out on the biggest part of Sam.”
“It’s sad, but that’s her choice,” Grace said, setting the paintbrush down.
“Her choice or not, Paxton is missing out too,” Liv said, thinking about how awkward and uncomfortable it was when the three of them were in the room together. “He won’t even talk to me if he thinks she’s in the house, and she’s too busy judging my parenting skills to see how far he’s come. It’s this horrible cycle that’s only getting worse. I don’t know how to fix it.”
“Then stop trying to fix it,” Avery said, as if it were that easy.
“And what? Let Paxton miss out on how amazing it could be having a grandparent? No way. I know what it’s like to grow up with just a mom, and I remember what it was like when I lost her. I don’t want that for Paxton.”
“But this isn’t amazing,” Avery said gently. “And before you give me that look, hear me out. You’re a nurturer—that’s what you do. You want to make sure everyone is taken care of, and taken care of right.” Even though Avery made her sound a little like a control freak, Liv decided to take that as a compliment. “But if you’re always smoothing things over, it will never get hard enough for him to push through the fear.”
“Exactly—Paxton’s had enough hard in his life.”
