Page 65 of Losing Forever
She grips my bicep and nestles her head on my shoulder. “I like the way you think, Grayson. And even though Noah disagrees, I think you're good for me.”
Immense pride swells inside me. For the first time since my life derailed, I feel grounded. Helpful. Necessary.
While I sit with my chest puffed, my head higher than it's ever been, Braylee dozes off on my shoulder.
An elderly woman walks down the aisle, her gaze shifting from Braylee to me. She pauses. “That's a lovely girl you've got. Don't take her for granted. Cherish her, and she'll always stay by your side.” She pats my arm with her wrinkled hand and continues to her seat a couple of rows back.
Her words circle in my head, and I tense, my skin growing moist with sweat. One day soon, Braylee won't be at my side. I won’t stop her when that day comes, either. Hell, I’ll probably be the one to send her running.
She thinks I’m good for her because she’s yet to experience how reactive I can be—knocking out a cameraman—or how great I am at self-sabotaging relationships. If only she knew how I was as a teenager. She got a taste in the pool that one day, but that was mild compared to the trouble I got into as I grew older.
Senior year is a perfect example. Mom’s warning rings in my head as if she were scolding me all over again.
It was prom night. Noah and I were waiting for the limo when Mom overheard me.
“I wish I had two dates for tonight. One for each arm and one for each side of the bed.” I smirked at Noah.
Mom flew through the open front door and shook her finger at me. “Be careful what you wish for, Grayson. Not all wishes are granted with respect. That’s how the world teaches us lessons.” She pointed to my groin. “And keep your pecker in your pants, for Christ’s sake.”
With that, she turned on her heel and stormed back into the house.
I blew off her words and chose to listen to the advice my dad had given me most of my life: “Use the gifts God gives you to your advantage, son, and don’t settle for anything less than the best.”
As a cocky, popular baseball player, I had no intentions of settling. I was dating Arianna after all. All the guys in school wanted her. We’d been an item for a few weeks. She was hot but a boring lay, always concerned about her appearance instead of enjoying the moment.
Her good friend, Daisy, was another story. I'd slept with her before I started dating Arianna—not that I dated anyone for long. Daisy didn’t care what she looked like during sex—lights on, no makeup, creative positions—no problem. She was a freak in bed, with mind-blowing oral skills. I was open to hitting that again and would have asked Daisy to prom if I hadn’t already promised to take Arianna.
Little did I know Mom’s warning would come back to haunt me.
Daisy's date canceled last minute, and Arianna suggested the three of us go together. Dinner was great, prom a blast, the limo ride to the hotel even better.
Arianna and I started making out in the backseat. I had my hand under her dress and between her legs while she sat beside me. As I kissed and worked her into a frenzy, Daisy decided to go down on me.
Arianna was too lost to notice, her eyes closed as she devoured my mouth with her tongue. I straightened my lower body so Daisy could work her magic on my dick. I was just about to empty myself into Daisy's amazing mouth, when Arianna reached down to touch me.
“What the fuck?” She shot upright and shoved Daisy onto her ass. “You dirty, fucking whore! How dare you touch him!”
“Me?” Daisy shifted onto the long seat behind her and wiped her lips. She gestured to me. “What about him? I didn't see your man stopping me. He was loving it. I bet he was more turned on than he's ever been with you. Face it. You're not enough for him. He needs a girl who can take him deep, and everybody knows you have a shallow gag reflex.”
Arianna’s face turned bright red. “That was one time in tenth grade. God, you're such an evil bitch. I can't believe I said you could be his date, too. Nice fucking friend. When we get to the hotel room, call for a ride because you're not welcome.” She turned her heated glare on me. “You're not welcome, either. Asshole. I’m texting Megan to tell her what happened. She’s going to be pissed.”
She dug her phone out from her small purse while I hiked up my pants, my dick soft but fully loaded, promising a nasty set of blue balls.
This wasn’t going to end well. Megan was Noah’s girlfriend and Arianna’s best friend. She was also protective as hell and thrived on drama. The only reason Megan and Noah weren’t in the limo with us was because they had to stay for Prom King and Queen pictures. They were going to meet us at the hotel later.
Arianna dropped her phone into her purse, a smug grin on her face. “Noah isn’t welcome at the hotel now, either.”
“What? Why?”
“She thinks Noah’s presence will upset me more. I’m hysterical as it is.” She dabbed at her dry cheek, no tears in sight, and made a dramatic frown. “No happy ending prom night for either of you.”
Just like Mom had said, I wished, and I received. But not in the way I had expected.
After that night, I created my one-and-done policy and stuck with it until Taryn.Never again, I reminded myself when she dumped me. Never again would I try to be someone I'm not.
I glance down at Braylee asleep on my arm, her cheek pressed to my shoulder. Should I remind her I'm not the kind of guy you get attached to, or should I just break things off? If I hurt her, I'd feel it deeper than anything I've known.
But how do I end things when we're just getting started? When things are so good? Sexually, I’m not even a tenth of where I want to be with her. I wasn't lying when I said I've never had full honesty with anyone before. She's my first.
