Page 109 of One Little Lie
“I know,” I sigh. “I just … what if I can’t do this? What if I can’t keep her?”
“If you don’t try, you won’t have to worry about keeping her. If you don’t put in the effort, you will lose her.”
“It’s been weird being here. We’re all in this limbo of real-life responsibilities and vacation. I don’t know how to have her in my life when we’re not here. What if we don’t want the same things?”
“That’s what conversations are for, Halt. As scary as it is, you are leaving the mountain soon. Do you want her to go with you?”
“Of course I do.”
“Then you need to talk to her. Work it out. Make a plan. Grab ahold of your future before it’s too late.”
“I’m afraid of holding her back,” I admit, and immediately hate the catch in my voice. “What if Dad was right, and I can’t hold her up in the spotlight she deserves?”
Easton sits back in his chair and observes me for so long it becomes uncomfortable. He rubs his chin between his thumb and forefinger before speaking.
“You want to know something else we have in common?”
My eyebrows lift in confusion. Is he just going to ignore my concern?Nice, East. Way to be there for me.
“We’re not quitters, and we don’t let fear control us. I was fucking terrified of spilling my guts to Lexi, but I did it because I knew I wanted her. Whether you want to acknowledge it or not, you’ve been doing scary shit your entire life. You’ve never backed away from an event, even when you would struggle to stay standing through it. You showed up. Show up for her, too, Halt. Show up for yourself. Don’t allow fear to ruin your future.”
His words are rattling around in my head when the front door opens, and Colton bursts through.
“She got it! She got the job. Can you believe it? She’s going to kill it in NYC! Models, and parties … hey,” he stops mid-stride and calls to someone behind him, “will I get to meet the models?”
“What the hell are you talking about?” Easton asks when Colt pauses for a breath.
That’s when I notice Rylan standing quietly in the doorway with a flush to her cheeks.
“Rylan. She got the photography job with Lochlan’s sister. Ryguy! Holy shit, this is going to skyrocket you to the next level. Red carpets, parties, interviews, after parties. This is it for you. This is everything you’ve been waiting for. Everyone will know your name by October, and you’ll be able to cherry pick your jobs after this. You’ll be the next Annie Leibovitz.”
Colton is speaking so fast I can’t keep up. My gaze hasn’t left Rylan’s. She seems happy but nervous. My brain is still unraveling everything Colton is saying.
Hello, panic, my old friend.
It pops into my head before I even realize my heart is racing.
“This is good news?” I know it is, but I need to hear her say it. I need to hear that this is what she wants.
Biting her lip, she nods. “I think it is good news. It’s not really the direction I thought I would go, but Colty’s right. If I nail this show, I could do everything I’ve always wanted.”
Parties. Red carpets. After parties. Interviews.
I’m going to end up holding her back from her dreams.
Her phone rings, and a pretty smile graces her face. Holding it up, she seeks me out. “It’s … I’ve got to take this. I’ll see you tonight?”
I smile even though my heart is cracking.
I can pretend to be strong. I can pretend to fit in, but for how long? I won’t survive in that life of parties and models, and I can’t very well ask her to give up her dreams.
What the fuck am I supposed to do now?
“Hello, panic, my old friend,” I mumble the words, and I don’t care who hears. Silent words aren’t cutting it right now as I clench my jaw and force air in and out through my nose.
“Breathe, Halton. Just—”
“I’m going to run and call Loch. See if he has any more details for our girl!” Colton bolts from the room without a care in the world. He has no idea I’m seconds away from blacking out. He has no idea that my world is silently crashing in on top of me. He’s happy forour girlin a way that I should be, but I can’t even get my ass out of this chair. He’s always going to be the one to raise her up while I drag her down.
