Page 16 of One Little Lie
“Jesus, Rylan. I fucking hate that name.”
“I know.” I laugh. “That’s why I said it. Now, tell me before I really pull out the big guns.”
His voice is soft, and I can hear the rain hitting the car as he drives. “I-I just … you’re my talisman. You bring me good luck. I need that tonight.”
My chest aches for him. Hatty is harder on himself than I ever thought possible. It’s almost like he hates himself. Loathes who is he, but I never understood why. He’s incredible.
“Well, I’m not sure how good a talisman I can be from four hours away, you jerk. Why didn’t you tell anyone? If not me, why not Ash or your mom?”
“You know why. You’re the only one I would have told, but I don’t want you to see me fail. I’m not like the rest of my family. I don’t fit in, and they wouldn’t understand. They would have showed up because that’s what we do, but they wouldn’t get me. Not like you do.”
“I don’t think you give any of us enough credit,” I grumble. “And why are you so sure you’re going to fail, Hatty? I’ve known you my whole life. I know how amazing you are.”
“Talisman,” he whispers. “The traffic is picking up. I should go. Will you be up for a while? If I make it inside, I probably won’t get out until after midnight.”
“You know I will.” But I already know I’ll be there by his side, no matter how much trouble I’m about to get into.
“Thanks. Talk to you soon.”
“Yup. See ya, Hatty.”
The bus pulls into the station, and I wrap my coat tighter around my shoulders. It’s scary as hell out here by myself. By myself. The thought has me pulling up short, and the person behind me barrels into my back.
“Sorry,” I mumble and step to the side.
I’ve always had Colton on one side and Hatty on the other. My protectors, my friends, my family. I love them both, but I also know that love isn’t equal. My love for Hatty has changed, evolved, or maybe I just became acutely aware of it at some point in the last few years. Regardless, I’ve never acted on it. We’re friends, and telling him how I feel would surely ruin my relationship with both Westbrooks. Selfishly, I know I need them both too much to risk it.
Shaking my head, I pull up the map on my phone and start the quarter-mile walk to the river arts district. I have no idea what gallery he’s in, but I’m hoping it won’t be hard to find. Thankfully, the rain has subsided, but it’s a dreary night for such a special occasion.
I walk faster than usual. Maybe it’s nerves doing this alone, or maybe I just sense Hatty’s discomfort like it’s my own, but I make it to the corner of Lyman Street and River Arts Place in record time.
The streets are busy with people fluttering about. Whispers of grand art and spectacular landscapes drift through the open air, but it all fades as my eyes land on Hatty, sitting on the side of the road with his head in his hands.
He didn’t go inside, and my heart plummets for him. I can’t help but wonder if he would have gone in if I’d been with him.
Quietly, I make my way down the block until I’m standing right behind him. “Give me a word, Hatty?”
His shoulders tense, but his head springs up, searching to his left, then right, so I step forward and take a seat on the wet pavement beside him. He slumps forward on a sigh.
“Dulcet.”
“What is?” I ask.
“Your voice. I-I couldn’t go in. They wanted me to speak to the group. There were only about twenty people, but all their eyes would have been on me. I just couldn’t do it.”
Resting my head on his shoulder, I feel him relax. “If my voice soothes you, why wouldn’t you have let me be here for you, Hatty? Make me understand.”
“I don’t understand myself, Rylan. How am I supposed to make you understand?”
“Try? For me?”
Turning his face, he rests his chin on the top of my head.“My brothers are larger than life. My parents are literally the best people I’ve ever known, and they expect nothing of us but to give back to the community. To be a good person. My brothers excel at putting on a show, playing the part, but me? God, Rylan. I die inside a little every time I have to put on a suit and smile for the cameras. There are so many of us I can hide behind them, but when it’s just me? I-I want nothing more than to run and hideaway on a mountain somewhere so no one can see me. I have every opportunity in the world. My family is richer than sin, and I can’t even bring myself to put it to good use by participating in the events my mom plans. How messed up is that?”
I squeeze his arm in encouragement, and he continues.
“I hoped by doing this on my own, I’d prove something, at least to myself. But all it did was confirm my inability to fit in. I don’t fit in anywhere.”
“You fit with me, Hatty. You always have.”
