Page 25 of Falling Into Forever
“My favorite flower?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Jesus, Saylor. Because, okay?” I let out a frustrated breath and tug on the hair at the nape of my neck. “They couldn’t come up with a name. And regardless of what you saw on gossip sites, until the day Poppy was born, you were still the only person in my life who could make me come alive. I needed you to be part of me—of my life that I was living without you.”
Her eyes are wide and searching.
“However I could have you.” My voice is barely audible.
She takes a small step back.
“Poppies are the flower of remembrance and hope—you taught me that. I wanted a reminder of you every day to keep the hope alive that it wasn’t our end.”
Saylor shakes her head, but the movement is so slight and sad that I force myself to give her space.
“Her—her mother?”
“I’ve told Lena all about you. She was my first friend when I got to California.”
I drop my forehead into one hand, the other resting low on my hips. This is not how I envisioned telling Saylor about how my life spiraled when I found out my father had spawned four other children, but nothing ever goes to plan with her, so I shouldn’t be so surprised.
“Poppy’s four, Saylor, and she’s amazing—anything and everything good I’ve ever tried to be is reflected in that little girl. I can’t let her believe, even for a second, that she’s not a priority in anyone’s life because while it’s true she wasn’t planned, she is loved, even if my brother can’t be bothered. I remember what it was like growing up like that, with a father who was indifferent, and I vowed to never let her feel that way if I could help it.”
She nods but won’t look at me.
“And you have a brother?”
I pinch the back of my neck, then stretch it side to side. There’s a lifetime of information and no easy way to explain it. “Three of them, actually. And a sister, but I haven’t met her yet. Apparently, my father got around each time we moved.”
She drags her necklace back and forth on its chain.
“I found out from those genealogy tests we did.” This causes her to step back and tilt her long lashes up at me. “When I left here, I needed something or someone to fill the Saylor-sized hole in my life, so I went in search of Trent, since he was closest in age to me. He was a childhood actor who was struggling with drugs and booze. I stayed with him for a while, got him clean, and helped him get a few jobs. Life snowballed from there.”
“I’m glad you had someone.” Her voice is so low that I strain to hear her.
“What did you see online?” Right now, Saylor and I feel like a team. It’s not lost on me that the one person I’m placing all my trust in is the one whose trust I may have broken beyond repair. “Scandals and drama like this don’t simply happen in Hollywood. They’re carefully, meticulously orchestrated. Which means they’ve been planning my demise for a while.”
“I—I…you should google it yourself.”
I run a hand through my hair, tugging roughly on the ends. “It’s that bad?”
She nods.
“Please look at me, Saylor.”
I hear her gulp, and even though my world is turning inside out, it pulls a small smile from me. Finally, she lifts her gaze but keeps her head bowed.
“Please tell me?”
“Please google it,” she murmurs.
My stomach drops out. If anyone has the motivation to cause me pain right now, it’s Saylor. And she refuses to do it.
“I can’t. My phone was in my pocket when I pulled you from the lake. It’s currently in a bag of rice, drying out.”
“Shoot.” She picks at her bottom lip, and my gaze lingers longer than is polite. “Come on,” she says. “Meet me at the sofa.” She eases past me in the doorway, careful not to touch me, and runs to her office while I stand beside her coffee table. She’s in front of me a second later with her laptop, motioning me to sit, so I do, and she places the laptop on the coffee table, then presses play.
