Page 127 of Love Notes & Lifelines
Lucía nods her head with a gentle, maternal smile, and Stella stops spiraling.
“I know that you got the scar on your shoulder blade on a metal park slide when you were six,” I recite. “And that you didn’t go to senior prom because you couldn’t afford a dress.”
She scowls and shoots Elijah a dark glare that could melt glaciers. He shrugs and blows her a kiss.
“That’s all stuff you read in a folder, Beck. It’s not the same. You shouldn’t rush into anything you might regret—what if a year passes and you regret it all, especially me?”
“God, I love you, but you’re more fucked up than I am.”
“Mayday, mayday,” Elijah says with his hands cupped around his mouth.
“That’s—probably true.” Stella laughs and drops her face into her hands.
“Just telling it like it is, baby,” I say with a waggle of my brows when she peers up at me.
“But—how do you know? she asks.
“I don’t.” My expression is carefree, but she frowns. “There are no guarantees in this life, and love is not cut-and-dried. Hell, I’m not sure I even knew what romantic love was until I met you, but I’ve lived my life on instinct, and every fiber of my being is saying to keep you. I’m jumping into the fire with you because in my heart, I know it’s right. Are you willing to do the same with me?”
The column of her delicate neck works to swallow, and I could swear an eternity passes before she speaks. The air is so thick my shirt sticks to my chest and goosebumps appear on my arms.
If she’s silent for much longer I’m sure steam will billow from my ears, and I’m willing to bet she’s running through every possible scenario and all the ways this could go wrong instead of how it’s right.
“We’re trusting each other, remember?” I encourage while taking her hand in mine. I love running my thumb over the diamond I placed on her ring finger.
She sighs and it blows the hair away from her face. She’s scared, terrified maybe, but she’s also determined, and it all adds up to a woman I will love until my last breath. After all the pain and betrayal she’s faced, she’s choosing me. She’s going to trust me.
“It’s not that I don’t want to marry you, Beck?—”
“I don’t want to hear any ‘but’ in that sentence, Stella.”
“I do want to marry you,andI have a stipulation.”
I furrow my brows, feeling my forehead wrinkle. “What’s that?” I ask slowly.
“You give me a prenup.”
Back to fucking money.
“Why?”
“I want one.”
Irritation prickles my neck. “Do you think I’m not serious about us? That this will end?”
“It’s not that,” she pleads, but I pull away and walk to the wall of windows.
“Then explain.”
“I need it, Beck. I need it to quiet the voices in my head that are not my own. The ones whispering dark thoughts and darker words. The ones that tell me I’m a gold digger and a…whore,” she finishes on a whisper. “The ones that sound like Silas and cut like an enemy.”
I’m on her before she says another word. “You need a piece of paper to prove to an asshole who doesn’t exist in our lives that you’re not any of those things he’s said for far too long?”
She shakes her head and I’m vaguely aware of the audience behind us.
“I need it to prove it to myself, Beck. You don’t understand how confused I am sometimes. I know it doesn’t make any sense to you, but it does to me.” She drops her gaze to the floor and Daisie uses that moment to sit on her toes.
This fucking dog is a menace, but she protects Stella when I can’t, so I begrudgingly reach into my pocket and retrieve a doggy treat that I toss to her while I process Stella’s words.
