Page 23 of Love Notes & Lifelines
Three long breaths pass before she continues. “Try viewing the world through their untarnished eyes and tell me it doesn’t change…everything. There’s magic in their innocence that getslost with age. Hopefully, by doing this, I can be the one to help them hang onto it for a little longer.”
I envision Stella shrugging and shake my head. I’m so fucking tired my wires are getting crossed.
“What else?” I ask, then lie down until I’m flat on my back with my feet crossed at the ankles and one hand behind my head. With her in my ear, I can almost forget that I’m on a hardwood floor.
“Well, at one of my jobs, I work for this guy I can’t figure out. The files he gives me never match the ones in his office, but don’t ask me how I know that. There’s this other guy who works down the hall. He’s very young, but he would give me a funny look anytime I gave him something directly because my boss prefers to be the go-between. Anyway, it took a while, but now we’re on the same page, we just can’t pinpoint what’s wrong. It’s all very cloak-and-dagger stuff and we’re probably wrong anyway.”
“You should tell someone,” I say.
“Hmm. We will when we’re sure it isn’t an error on our part. Like I said, he’s very new, and it’s not really my field of expertise.”
“Good.” Words are getting harder to say. I close my eyes.
“It’s late, Beck, and you need to sleep.”
“Why do you have two jobs?”
“I’ve got to pay the bills.”
“Do you have anyone to lean on?”
She doesn’t answer and I’m suddenly as alert as if I’d heard a fire alarm.
“Jane?”
“Yeah, sorry. I’m here.”
“Do you have someone you can lean on?”
Her sigh races through the line as if her lips are pressed to my cheek and not the phone. “Not anymore. Life’s hard. You’re experiencing that firsthand right now. But I do believe you’reexactly who those girls need. It’ll be rocky at times, but lead them with love, and the rest will fall into place.”
“I’m going to take them to the doctor tomorrow. Emmy was sad tonight and tried to hide her grief.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. You’re doing the right thing, though,” she says quietly. She’s always quiet, and so damn gentle.
“Jane?”
“Yes.”
“I think I let a fifteen-year-old grudge take my sister from me.”
She makes a choking sound, and her sadness carries through the phone. “You can go down every what-if road, but it won’t change the past. Learn to forgive yourself for whatever’s causing you pain, then move forward. If you don’t move forward, neither will the girls.”
“Have you heard of Delacroix Farms?” Shit. Here goes another line of personal information I promised not to cross.
“I have,” she says cautiously.
I ignore the questions rattling around in my mind. The ones asking why it’s easy to tell this virtual stranger things I don’t tell anyone else.
“Well, it used to be Hayes and Delacroix. My dad was in a car accident when I was almost twenty, but he had already planned to leave the company to Vincent Delacroix in a trust that was doled out to us at Delacroix’s discretion. He gave us just enough to survive, then when my mom passed away a few years later, he took the entire damn company. My sister fell in love with his son—and then they took over the company.”
Her silence squeezes my heart in a way I can’t explain. It’s as if somehow, she’s sharing my burden. I have no idea why I’m telling her this. I don’t know her. Maybe it’s because she’s signed the same rock-solid NDA that I have, or maybe it’sbecause needing someone isn’t a choice I can ignore anymore, and needing a stranger feels a hell of a lot safer.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be burdening you with all of this.”
“Sometimes it’s easier to tell a faceless stranger you’ll never meet. It’s healthy to get things off your chest. It sounds as though you’ve been holding onto that anger and hurt for a long time.”
I nod, even though she can’t see me.
