Page 77 of Late Nights & Love Lines
I’ve been in my own world since we arrived at Beck’s house, but the bomb Lottie just dropped had me zoning out even more, so it takes a few seconds to register that someone’s talking to me.
“Are you okay?”
Beck’s wife, Stella, sits beside me on the oversized sectional on their deck. Their vibe, this house, it’s all so surprisingly casual. They obviously have money, but their home has been designed and furnished with children in mind.
Even the ocean air is lighter here. Maybe the storms only brew over my head.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I say with a smile that hurts my soul.
“I heard you had a rough day,” she says gently. This woman is a fixer. I sense it the same way I know when someone is bad for me. What did she go through that made her the way she is?
That’s the thing about remaining a loner. Those kinds of questions have never occurred to me before. But now I’m finding questions everywhere I turn.
Closing my eyes, I remember Seren’s face when she exited Sebastian’s office. But the devastation she expressed was nothing compared to Sebastian’s when he followed her out.
“They’re all hurting,” I say evasively.
“I can only imagine how hard that is. I don’t mean to pry, but it doesn’t seem as though you’re completely unaffected by it either.”
I mindlessly run my hand over Miles’s head. He crawled up next to me after dinner and now he’s passed out with his head in my lap. It’s taken the full hour, but I no longer feel the need to claw at the itching sensation where his cheek presses against my thigh.
Once I was able to settle, I was startled to find that my mind was quick to quiet again. Is it really the healing power of the ocean, or is it something else, something so terrifying I don’t even want to think the word into existence—home?
“I’m okay.” Even I can hear how hollow I sound.
Loud laughter in the kitchen draws our attention to the open glass doors.
I’d come out here because inside was…too much. People are everywhere, and I’ve never felt like such an outsider—given my history, that’s saying something.
But I haven’t been able to stop staring at them either. Beck and Stella’s family, Leo and his fiancée, and even a couple I’ve only met in passing have all opened their arms to Sebastian, Pappy, and Alexei as if they’ve always been a part of their blended family. The kids run wild and happy while the adults move around each other in a perfectly choreographed dance that I never learned.
Beck’s loading the dishwasher while Sebastian washes pans in the sink. Leo walks behind them, saying something that makes everyone laugh.
Alexei, who must be drying dishes on the other side of Sebastian, holds up a pot, and Beck points to a cabinet in the island.
Pappy and Elijah sit on the other side of the deck with their heads together as though they’ve known each other their entire lives.
Leo’s girlfriend, Tabby, joins us on the sofa holding a sleeping baby boy. “It’s so much quieter out here,” she laughs.
“Yeah,” I choke out.
I catch her in my peripheral vision, tilting her head back to find what has my attention.
“It’s a lot, huh?” Tabby asks.
My throat is too dry to respond, and I’m saved when Kade runs full speed into my side. I hold my hands out to stop him from jumping on his brother’s head.
“Row-row.” Excitement shines in his eyes. “I love Ruby.”
Tabby and Stella laugh out loud, but my palms feel clammy.
“I’m glad, buddy. You’re having fun?” I ask, praying that I can keep the internal trembling I feel from the words.
“Yup. I’m goin’ to marry Ruby.”
“Oh boy.” Stella giggles. “You’d better see what Uncle Beck has to say about that.”
My face snaps to hers. Uncle Beck? Does that sort of thing happen that fast? Can you just say someone’s your family and have it be true? I can almost feel the color drain from my face.
