What if impressing people who don’t care about me doesn’t matter?
What ifshe—right now, right here—matters more?
The realization hits me like a physical thing, stealing my breath.
I’ve spent my entire life trying to earn love that was never going to be freely given. Chasing approval from people who will never see me as anything but a disappointment. Believing that I had to accomplish something, achieve something,besomething before I deserved to be chosen.
But Selene chose me. When I was dripping wet and embarrassed. When I carved the “wrong” pumpkin. When I screamed in a haunted house.
She choseme.
I look down at her—at this incredible woman who somehow sees value in all the things I’ve been taught to hide, who finds my vulnerabilities endearing instead of shameful.
To hell with the alliance.
To hell with proving myself to people who will never care.
To hell with my father and my brother and the entire weight of family expectations that’s been crushing me my whole life.
I wantthis. I wanther.
Without a word, I cup her face in both hands and kiss her.
Chapter
Six
SELENE
Ilead Khatak by the hand into my bedroom. My own small space of luxury. Of complete and utter safety. Because that’s what living in this alien universe has become: a sense of always being on alert, always waiting for the moment when someone grabs me again.
But not him. For some insane reason, I trust Khatak.
“I know it’s not much,” I stammer, suddenly feeling shy. “But I…”
I want to impress him, I realize. For the first time since I arrived on this planet, this room feels like something I want another to approve of. It’s all I have. I’ve never cared before, when the other girls have come to hang out and watch whatever accounts for dramatized television on alien channels.
I glance around, trying to see my space through his eyes. My neatly made bed, the lilac sheets pulled crisp. The window overlooking a private courtyard for staff—one where no alien guests can pass by unannounced. A doorway leading to my own fully tiled bathroom. Small, though I prefer to call it cozy. Bigger than the one back on Earth, I have to admit. I never had a walk-in bathroom of my own before.
Khatak walks around in my space. There’s not much for his gaze to linger on. I haven’t collected trinkets. Not like back home. I used to travel a lot. I used to buy a souvenir from each of the places I visited, leaving them behind before I went on another adventure. Here… my room is bare. Barren.
No. It’s tidy and neat, I tell myself. I don’t need alien junk to put in here. Just the things that remind me of home.
Khatak turns to face me. The way his eyes seem to glow, to pierce into my soul and see everything…
Not an invasion, I tell myself. My nerves hammering at my body, my heart bumping out an erratic rhythm. I invited him here. I chose this.
I could always tell him no. I could always end this…
But it’s not what I want, is it? There are a bunch of us humans living on this planet, and we’re all girls. And as much as I love them, I want that deeper connection with someone. I always have. Sometimes I wonder if that’s why I traveled so much before, always searching for that special someone.
What if it’s him?
“Are you sure about this, Selene?” he asks. He speaks quietly, barely a whisper, but in the silence of the room his question is deafening.
No, I’m not sure about this. At least that’s what I want to say. But it’s the fact that he asks me that gives me pause. Most guys wouldn’t hesitate when invited behind closed doors. Most guys would plaster themselves to you, and whisk away any chance of a ‘no’ from my lips. Khatak isn’t most guys.
He’s an alien. But… he’s kind of my alien now, isn’t he?
