Page 25 of Ashes of Us
"It's not stupid. You're amazing at it." She stood up. "Look, I'm not going to tell you what to do. But if you're sitting here feeling like this doesn't fit anymore? Maybe listen to that."
She squeezed my shoulder and headed for the door, then paused.
"For what it's worth? You don't owe anyone anything. Not Brennan, not the kids, not even yourself. You're allowed to change your mind about what you want."
After she left, I sat there for a long time, staring at the empty lesson plan template.
You're allowed to change your mind about what you want.
Was I?
I pulled out my phone and opened a new browser tab. Typed in:How to start a bakery business.
CHAPTER 11: LIAM
I'd been blocked everywhere.
Phone calls went straight to a generic voicemail. Texts were undelivered. When I tried Instagram, her profile was gone, and it was the same thing with Facebook. She'd cut me off completely, severed every line of communication like I was a stranger.
Worse than a stranger. Strangers got the benefit of doubt.
For weeks now, I'd been living in our apartment surrounded by her things. Her clothes still in the closet. Her toothbrush still by the sink. The wedding planning binder I'd finally shoved into a closet because I couldn't stand looking at it anymore. I'd thrown out the wedding cake slices after a week—couldn't take opening the fridge and seeing them there, a reminder of everything I'd destroyed.
Piper hadn't come back for any of it, nor had she sent Maya to pick stuff up. It was like she'd decided she'd rather start over with nothing than have to see me again.
I got that. I did.
But I needed to talk to her. Needed to explain, to apologize properly, to make her understand that I knew I'd fucked up and I was sorry and I'd do anything to fix it.
So on a Tuesday afternoon, five weeks after what should have been our wedding day, I drove to Maya's apartment.
I knew Piper was still staying there. Had to be. And if Piper wouldn't answer my calls, maybe I could convince Maya to at least pass along a message.
I stopped at a grocery store on the way and bought flowers. Just a small bouquet from the floral section—daisies and some purple things I didn't know the name of. It felt stupid even as I was doing it. Flowers weren't going to fix this. But I had to do something. Show up empty-handed felt worse.
I parked on the street and walked up to the third floor with the flowers in one hand, feeling like an idiot. Knocked on 3C.
When Maya opened the door, her expression went from neutral to furious in half a second.
“Are you kidding?” she said. “No.”
"Maya, please, I just?—"
"Absolutely not. Nope. Not happening." She started to close the door but I stuck my foot in it.
"I need to talk to Piper?—"
"And I need a million dollars and a private island, but we don't always get what we want, do we?" She looked down at the flowers in my hand. "Are those grocery store daisies?"
"I just wanted to?—"
"What, apologize with seven-dollar flowers? That's your play? You cheated on her for four months and you thinkdaisiesare gonna fix it?" She let out a laugh that had zero humor in it. "Buddy. My guy. My dude. You are so far out of your depth you can't even see the shore anymore."
"I know I messed up.”
"You didn't mess up. You didn't forget to take out the trash or accidentally double-book dinner plans. You stuck your dick in someone else while my sister planned your wedding. That's nota mess-up. That's a choice. Or, rather, multiple choices. Like, hundreds of choices over four months."
"Can you just tell her I'm sorry? That I want to talk?—"
