Page 29 of More Than a Friend
I watch closely as Ava stabs some noodles and a piece of steak then brings it to her mouth. Her eyelashes flutter, and her head tips back as she moans at the taste, and I internally fist pump.
“Sky, this is seriously the best thing I’ve had in my mouth—well, foodwise—in a really long time,” she praises before she takes another bite.
My own fork pauses halfway to my mouth as I register what she just said. Is she talking about my…?
No, surely not.
Right?
Needing a distraction, I decide to ask her how therapy was today. “You said therapy was intense.”
Ava nods. “She gave me some homework last week, so we were talking about it today. Some heavy stuff, lots of hard realizations. Stuff like that.”
“What was the homework? Obviously, you don’t have to tell me if you’re not comfortable sharing,” I rush to add the last part, not wanting her to feel uncomfortable.
“I don’t mind sharing. I know you won’t judge me. She thinks I’m holding myself back from being happy, so she told me to think about what I wanted my future to look like. Who I wanted to be in it, where I wanted to go career-wise, how I want my kids to be raised. WhoIwant to be. Today, we came up with a fewsmall, short-term goals on how I can achieve some of the things I want. We’ll work on tackling more of them at my next session in two weeks.”
Am I part of your future, Ava? Do you want me there?
I want to ask so badly, but it feels needy, and I don’t want to be needy. “That’s great, Aves. Let me know if you need anything from me to help achieve your goals. I want you to be happy. You deserve it.”
Something passes across Ava’s face, but it’s gone before I can read it. “Thanks, Sky. I will.”
We finish our dinner in comfortable silence—something I’m glad Ava and I can do.
When we were teenagers, we’d often find ourselves holed up in one of our rooms reading a book or doing homework for hours without saying a word to each other. Ava and I have always had a special connection, which is why I’ve never even considered telling her about my feelings. To lose that would be like losing a piece of myself.
But something inside me shifted after our intimate moments together. Now I’m wondering if our connection could be something more—something deeper than the platonic love we share.
Could there be something romantic lying underneath the surface? Or is it all just wishful thinking on my part?
I’m not brave enough to ask out loud.
Chapter 14
Ava
Skylar’s nervous.
Though I don’t know why.
She’s the one who invited me over to…explore. But she’s barely able to look me in the eyes.
Every time we’ve touched—our fingers while we were washing the dishes, our thighs when we sat on her tiny-ass loveseat, or when we bumped into each other because we were rounding the same corner—she steps away from me quickly.
Sky also has a nervous tick where she braids and unbraids the same small section of hair over and over. She’s done it since we were teenagers, and she’s doing it now, watching the season finale ofCelebrity Dance Off.
Is she having second thoughts about tonight? Does she not want to do this? I hope she knows I would never be upset with her for backing out or changing her mind.
Sure, it would sting, but her comfortability and our friendship are more important than me learning what the difference between a dick and a strap-on feels like.
I take a deep breath and try to focus on the TV.
Rebecca and I talked extensively about my feelings for Skylar today—most importantly what I wanted to do about them.
Cry was my first answer.
Bury them and throw away the key was the second.
