Page 37 of More Than a Friend
Skylar
Ava’s suckedmy soul right out of my body.
Once again, I’m wondering how in the fuck a girl who’s only been with one person—oneman—has managed to make me feel boneless and sated in a way I’ve never felt before.
Except, I don’t know if I’ll ever be completely sated when it comes to Ava. I fear I’ll always crave justone moretaste.One moretouch.One moretime with her.
A girl can wish.
After I finally found the energy to move, Ava and I took turns showering. I wanted to shower together, but my bathroom only has a tiny stall, and we wouldn’t have fit comfortably.
While she was in the shower, I changed my wet sheets. I’ll never admit how red my face got when I saw the wet spot. I had no idea my body could do that.
Leave it to Ava to show me something new when she’s the inexperienced one.
In some type of unspoken agreement, we got into the clean sheets naked, Ava’s back pressed against my front. I have an arm draped over her waist, and her fingers are laced through mine.
It’s dark in here, save for the low red light from the clock on my dresser. The darkness creates a false sense of security, a blanket of safety to say things that have no right being said in the light of day. Things that could alter the entirety of our relationship.
I bite my lip to keep the words from tumbling out and force my eyes closed to try to get some semblance of rest.
I need to be rested for whatever happens in the morning, when things inevitably change despite both of us wishing they wouldn’t.
“Sky?” Ava whispers into the darkness.
“Yeah?” I whisper back.
“Have you ever had a crush on me?”
The question knocks the wind out of me, and my whole body goes rigid.
Why would she ask me that?
There’s no way she knows, right?
Do I tell her the truth? Would the truth scare her off?
I can’t ignore the question, and I can’t bring myself to tell an outright lie. I squeeze my eyes shut as I answer, like it’ll stave off the embarrassment. “Yeah, when we were teenagers.” It’s the truth, but not the whole truth. She doesn’t need the whole truth.
“Really? Why didn’t you say anything?”
I can’t help but scoff. “Ava, you didn’t know you were into women until recently. What was I supposed to do? Tell the most Molly Mormon girl I knew—mybest friend—I wanted to know what her lips taste like? You would have run for the hills. It’s a miracle you didn’t when I came out to you in college.”
Ava’s body shakes with laughter. “True. I wouldn’t have been the most… understanding person in high school. God, how times have changed.”
“You can say that again.”
After a few beats of silence, I think she’s going to drop the subject, but then she asks me another question, “So… you’re over your…crush…on me?”
Fuck.
I don’t want to lie to her. But the truth could ruin everything.
“Does the way I fucked you feel like I’m over it, Ava?” My tone is a bit harsher than I intend, and Ava doesn’t answer, so I turn the question back on her.
“Do you want me to be?”
Ava squeezes my hand, answering immediately, “No.”
