Page 89 of Forty and Fighting Dirty
Now he crouched in front of me, his eyes dark and beguiling.I tried to resist—I really did. I was so sick of making the same mistakes over and over again.
“Piper,” he whispered, “I know I made you feel like you were alone. I wish I could go back in time and knock some sense into myself.”
“You told me you wanted to kick me out of my home just two weeks after telling me I could stay here,” I whispered. “I thought I was safe here. With you.”
Pain streaked across his expression, and he dropped his head. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“Why? What freaked you out so much? You know I don’t have feelings for my ex-husband. What do you expect me to do? Cut him out of my kids’ lives?”
He shook his head. “No. I was wrong, Piper.”
My throat was so tight I couldn’t respond. His words sank in, and I realized they were words I’d never heard from my ex-husband. Every fight was a bitter chess match, where I had to watch everything I said in the hopes that my own words wouldn’t be turned back on me. Inevitably, with Jacob, I felt like my feelings were unreasonable, and whatever had happened had been my fault.
But Rhett hadn’t come here to berate me. He hadn’t found a gotcha moment in our history together and exploited it to get the upper hand. He’d just—apologized and said he was wrong.
Still crouching in front of me, his hair a mess, his clothes all crooked, Rhett took a deep breath and said, “All my life, when I let people in, they hurt me.” He held up his hand. “I’m not saying this as an excuse. I just want you to understand. I pretend to be this great guy around town and I do all thesegood deeds, but really it’s just a shield. If everyone thinks I’m a nice guy, they won’t see that I’m selfish and mean and bitter.” He swallowed thickly, his eyes sliding away. “You saw through me right away, Piper. It scared the shit out of me. I thought you’d expose me for a fraud. I thought you’d…” He shook his head.
“You thought I’d hurt you,” I finished quietly.
Rhett blew out a breath and met my gaze. “I think I was bracing myself for it. So when I saw your ex, and you denied that we were seeing each other even though Iknowwe weren’t official, and your kids were there, and you were caught off guard—I just felt like the walls were caving in on me. Like you were just the same as my ex, who used to take pleasure in making me feel like I would never be good enough for her.”
I huffed. “Funny, because I felt exactly the same way. I thought you were just likemyex, who used every advantage he had to control my life.”
Rhett’s expression turned tortured, his voice vehement. “I’ll never do that, Piper.”
The past couple of days had jaded me beyond belief. I reached over and touched a hand to Rhett’s cheek, stroking softly. I wished I believed him the way he believed himself right now. I sighed, fingers running over his rough stubble. “You can’t help yourself, Rhett. I’ll never have your money or your status. You’ll always have the advantage.”
He’d started shaking his head halfway through my words, and it only became more vehement until he said, “You’re wrong, Piper. I already called my lawyer.”
I frowned. “What do you mean?”
“The house.” He waved a hand at the walls around us. “It’s yours. He’s drawing up the paperwork now.”
I reared back. “What?”
“You made this into a home. It’s yours. It always has been, since the moment you walked through the door.”
My breath came faster, and now it was my turn to shake my head. “No.”
“What do you mean, no? I don’t want it, Piper. And I don’t want anyone but you to have it, either.”
“So I’ll buy you out,” I said, emphatic. Letting him give me a whole house—or even half of one—was just another thing that reminded me that he had power, resources, and control. My lungs hurt with every breath. “You can’t just give it to me. We’ll get it valued, and I’ll buy you out. It’ll all be fair and aboveboard.”
Rhett stared at me for a beat. His breath gusted out, and he dipped his chin. “Fine. If that’s what you need.”
I exhaled, equally relieved and disappointed. Why was I disappointed? I didn’t want him to give me the house. I just wanted to feel safe—and I wanted to feel like we were equals. But I’d just refused a gigantic leg up in life—something that would have actually given me security and the ability to feel settled. No, not just feel settled. Actuallybesettled. I didn’t know what to do or how to feel.
Frowning as Rhett pulled his phone out of his back pocket, I tried to peek at his screen. “Emailing your lawyer?” I asked.
“Work,” he responded.
Pain was like an elastic band snapping against my heart.Here I thought we were having a big, momentous, heartfelt conversation, but some mundane work email was more important?
“I’m amending your Christmas bonus,” he continued, clicking his phone screen off and sliding the device back into his pocket.
“My what?”
“I promised you a bonus if we got the lodge over the line before New Year’s.”
