Page 80 of Forty and Fighting Dirty
Piper hadn’t answeredmy message asking what we were having for dinner, so I went with red wine over white. That was what she’d had the night we ate with her sister and brother-in-law. Our hurried half conversation hung in the air around me, and I couldn’t quite help the shiver of anticipation that went through me as I climbed the Lovers Lane hill toward the house.
I had resigned myself to never being in a relationship after Sarah. I’d told myself it wasn’t worth the pain—and that no one worthy of a relationship would actually want to be with someone as selfish and fake as me. Opening myself up to another person was too raw, too vulnerable. I couldn’t afford to let anyone in. Instead, I became the man I wished my father could have been. I tried to be good. I tried to give back. I wore the mask of a decent man to hide the fear and inadequacy that lurked within.
Until now.
With Piper, I imagined a warm house full of laughter. Two boys who might want to throw a ball in the backyard. Evenings on the couch with a fire crackling in the hearth. A simple, quiet existence full of joy—real joy.
She was the only person I’d met who saw through the mask and still wanted me. I didn’t feel like I was faking it when I was with her. My smiles were real, and I didn’t have to put on an act. She made me wonder if maybe my mother had been wrong when she’d said I was a selfish, troublemaking boy. If my ex had lied when she’d told me that the reason she cheated was because I hadn’t been a good enough partner to her.
Maybe they were the ones who were selfish, worthless, and wrong.
My parents hadn’t loved me enough to want to treat me right. My ex had seen all the cracks inside me, and instead of wanting to help me heal them, she’d only used them to cut me into pieces. But Piper was different. She saw right through to the core of me and turned toward me instead of away.
I felt like the luckiest man in the world. I almost couldn’t believe she was real and she wanted me. I parked outside her house and smiled at the glittering lights on the Christmas tree visible through sheer curtains in the living room. Shapes moved beyond it: the boys darting across the room, driven by the energy of youth. My hand curled around the neck of the wine bottle as my other hand flipped down my visor so I could check my hair.
I huffed at myself—but I still brushed a few strands of hair back into place before climbing out of the truck and followingthe path to the front door. Still had to paint that door, and these days I didn’t mind imagining it a cheerful, happy yellow. We could do that when winter was over.
My knuckles knocked against the metal of the front door, and I took a step back as I waited for it to open. I had a key, of course, but it didn’t seem right to barge in. Maybe, over time, Piper’s home would be mine too. Maybe she’d let me into her warmth and light. Maybe we could grow old together.
“I’ll get it,” a deep voice called out, and my brows tugged together. In the seconds that followed, I tried to place the voice, but came up empty.
The lock scraped, the handle jiggled, and the door opened.
An unfamiliar face stared back at me. The man blinked. “Can I help you?” he asked, a mere second before his gaze dropped down to the bottle of wine wrapped in brown paper that dangled from my left hand.
Piper wrenched the door from his grasp, her eyes wide. “Rhett,” she exclaimed, as if she were surprised to see me. As if she hadn’t invited me over just a couple of hours ago. “Hi.”
I lifted the bottle. “I got red.”
“Oh. Um.” She inhaled sharply. “Thank you. Come… Yeah, come in.” She opened the door wider and stepped aside, but the man didn’t move out of the way.
We eyed each other as I slithered past, my annoyance mounting. Who the hell did this guy think he was? Piper closed the door behind me, her breath audible and rapid.
“Rhett, meet my ex-husband, Jacob. Jacob decided to surprise the boys this weekend with a visit.”
“Rhett,” the ex said, extending a hand to shake. Hesqueezed me hard in a pathetic show of bravado, then slid his pale blue eyes toward Piper. His mouth tightened. “You didn’t tell me you were seeing anyone.”
Flags of red appeared on Piper’s cheeks, a sure sign that her temper had ignited. Her eyes went flinty. “First of all, Jacob, I don’t have to tell you if and when I decide to date again.”
His own gaze was hard. “You do when a strange man is coming over to have dinner with my sons.”
“Rhett is not a strange man. He’s my boss and the co-owner of this house,” she snapped.
I waited for her to go on, to claim me as hers. To say that wewereseeing each other, and that I’d spent a hell of a lot more time with those sons of his than he had. She said nothing more.
“And why is your boss coming over with a bottle of wine?” Jacob asked, eyes on me. “Who else have you had hanging around the boys?”
“Mom?”
The three of us turned to see Nate and Alec standing by the living room opening, Alec’s fingers clinging to the trim edging the wall. Their eyes were wide and worried.
“Give me two minutes, okay?”
“Is Mr. Baldwin going to have dinner with us?”
“Mom made chili and cornbread,” Nate supplied. “Dad’s favorite, like me.”
I flinched. Why was she making her ex-husband’s favorite meal?
