Page 142 of Facing Off
I brace for all kinds of follow-up reactions. Their fears, their demands for answers, their requests for reassurances that I help guarantee their futures…
Meanwhile, multiple voices speak up.
“—thank you?—”
“—you always fight for us?—”
“—don’t have to do it alone?—”
“—so much pressure?—”
“—Captain, we have to figure out how to save ourselves together?—”
I’m palming the ground for support. Especially when Lokhov bluntly reminds me, “The superpower of the Vancouver Wings is ourwe. It’s how we won the Cup in the first place.”
My breath catches. Fuck. He’s right.
Quinn nods. “You can’t have unity on the ice, if we don’t have it off the ice. Part of that means facing tough decisions together. If one of us is in danger of being traded, we all want to join the fight to protect them.”
“Do you trust us, Cap?” Raghr wonders.
My eyes go big. “Of course I do!”
“So, if the situation was reversed and anyone else on the team was in your position, trying to lift all the responsibility on their shoulders, what would you tell them?”
And that question—it cuts through it all, pulling the rug out from underneath my feet. I’m dizzy as it hits my chest. The realization that if anyone else was captain, I’d never let them carry the burden I’ve been carrying alone. I’d be on the other side, leading this intervention.
I close my eyes and mutter, “Fuck.”
I’ve been so worried about what being a captain means, I’ve forgotten that I’m also one of twenty six. Like Lokhov said, never having to be alone is what being on the Wings means. Our team isn’t just players who work together. We stand stronger as one. Afraid of being selfish, afraid of losing them, afraid of my past repeating—I’d forgotten that.
“There’s something else.” Quinn’s scar shifts as he grimaces. “We were going to wait until next practice to do this, but a video is starting to go around. Tagged as being taken at your hometown and that’s how we figured you’d be here. As soon as I saw it, I messaged to see who else was available to drive out. That’s why we had to find you right away.”
“…what video?”
“I’m sorry, Cap. It’s your speech at the memorial.”
I start to tip over. Lokhov breaks from the group and steadies me.
Macklin flanks my other side, just in case. “If it helps, the reaction’s been really positive online. About what you went through.”
My fists tighten. “No one can bother the Osler family?—”
“They’ll be protected,” Lokhov interrupts. “The Wings PR people are already on it.”
“So, everyone…knows about Jesse?”
In their expressions, there’s no pity to be found. Only quiet nods of empathy. They wait patiently for my reaction.
My hand grips Lokhov’s shoulder. And I’m leaning against Macklin, shaking. Because I feel…
Relieved.
My past is fully out in the open. It’s no longer clawing inside me. It’s free.
I didn’t think it was possible.
How did I get here?
