Page 35 of Blood Vows
“Why did you hide in the library?” I smiled faintly, though the memory carried its own kind of ache.
“It was the only place I could go where the noise stopped. Where no one shouted or communicated with their fists. Where no one remembered I existed. I used to tuck myself away in corners with the company of stories. I’d read about love and bravery, about happy endings, even though by the end, I didn’t really believe in them.” He said nothing, but I could feel the weight of his attention. It wasn’t pity, though. It was something else. Something deeper.
“Those stories were everything,” I continued softly.
“They took me around the world, back in time, and somewhere into the future. For a little while, I could dream. I could pretend I was the child I never got to be. It became my safe haven, surrounded by worlds of escapism when escape in reality was still years out of reach.”
The fire popped in the hearth, and the sound filled the silence between us. I hadn’t meant to say so much, but the words had slipped out like a confession.
When I finally looked back at him, he hadn’t moved. His eyes followed me, unreadable, but there was a tension in his jaw, a quiet restraint that told me he was holding something back.
“You ever try to run away?” he asked suddenly. His tone wasn’t mocking, just curious. I gave a small, rueful smile.
“More times than I can count. I never got far. I think I just wanted to know what it felt like, to make the choice to leave, even if I didn’t succeed.” He studied me for a long moment, then said,
“You’re stronger than you think, you know.” I blinked, caught off guard.
“What do you mean?”
“You didn’t let it break you,” he said simply.
“Most would have turned bitter, but you didn’t. You still see light where others would see nothing but shadow.” I felt the heat rise in my cheeks before I could stop it. Compliments from him were rare, dangerous even, because they always came laced with something that felt too honest.
“I don’t know if that’s strength… Maybe it’s just denial.” I said quietly.
“I don’t think so. You can bury memories, Nessa, but everything that happens to us in this life shapes us and in that, comes a choice.”
“A choice?”
“You can always choose how you wish for those memories to shape you. Many give up and let self-pity consume them…you didn’t.You just choose to fight harder for the life you wanted, not one dictated by violence or trauma. You became the hero in your own story.” I couldn’t help but feel the tears fall at this. He reached out and with the gentlest touch, he swiped them away.
“Why do you cry?”
“Because… because that’s the nicest thing anyone ever said to me.” At this he gave me a soft tender look, as he nodded his head, silently receiving my thanks.
“What about you?” I asked after he took a step back, letting his hand drop from my face as he pulled away.
“Did you ever have a place like this, somewhere you could hide?”
He froze. The question hung between us like a fragile thread, and I instantly regretted pulling it. His eyes darkened, the softness gone, replaced by something impenetrable.
“I don’t hide,” he said at last, his voice low.
“Not anymore.”It wasn’t anger in his tone, it was something colder, something final.I wanted to ask more, to pry open that wall just enough to see what lay beneath it, but one look at him told me he had already shut the door.
The firelight flickered between us, the warmth of it suddenly distant. I folded my arms against the chill that wasn’t there and turned my gaze back to the books, pretending to read the titles. But I could still feel his stare on me, heavy and searching, as though he was torn between keeping his distance and stepping closer. And it was that same quiet tension that followed us when the thunder cracked again, closer this time, and he turned back to the window, his voice quieter.
“Get some rest, Nessa. The storm won’t last forever.”
I wanted to ask him how he could be so sure, but when I looked up, he was already making his way to the door. Ready to leave me with only the rain, the fire, and the echo of his voice. And somewhere deep inside me, I realised I didn’t want the storm to end.
So, I followed him.
Foolish as it maybe, I couldn’t seem to help it. I craved his presence and he… well something in him wanted mine.
He walked me back to my room as he always did, the silence between us thick with unspoken things. We reached the end of the hall just as another flash came, bright enough to sear the shadows from the walls. The thunder that followed cracked so violently that it rattled the windows and before I could stop myself, a scream tore from my throat.
In the next instant, I was in his arms.
