Page 93 of Cadence
“You heard me,” he says knowingly, but worse than that is the irritation underneath his words. Beau never yells, not when he has a certain tone that can shout louder. “I’ve had my suspicions something was going on all tour, but I know what I saw. Don’t even try to deny it.”
My hands curl into fists as the memory of Beau standing at the end of the hallway flashes behind my eyes. That look on his face I couldn’t place then. I can now.
Disgust. Disappointment. Fury.
“What the hell is your problem?” I snarl, stalking toward him.
“Hold on. You and Paige?” Eli repeats, still frozen. “Since when?”
But I’m not looking at him. I’m locked on Beau, red-hot and ready to snap.
“You told me to be nice to her—”
“I didn’t tell you to stick your fucking dick in her, though, did I?” he snaps.
“Jesus, Beau,” Eli mutters, glancing between us.
My shoulders stiffen as I suck in a breath through my nose. “It’s not like that.”
Beau barks out a humorless laugh. “No? Then what is it, Maddox? A one-time thing? A mistake? Or are you just fucking her while we’re on tour, hoping no one notices until it’s over?”
My thumb brushes over my knuckles, a muscle in my neck twitching painfully. “It’s none of your business.”
“The fuck it isn’t.”
I’m in his face, teeth aching as I grind them together. “You think I don’t know what’s on the line? You think I don’t care?”
“Doesn’t look like you do,” he growls. “You’re sneaking around with our drummer while a label rep is watching. While Reign’s deciding if we go to Europe. While Thea’s busting her ass to make things happen and you’re blowing this—”
“I’m not blowing anything—”
“Stop lying!” Beau's voice rises. “You’re gambling with everything we’ve built. Do you even remember what it took to get here? We’ve damn near killed ourselves just to get the chance to be in the same room as people like Reign. I worked double shifts at Rise and Grind to afford studio time. Eli was sketching new tattoos for clients after playing shows at midnight to pay for new equipment. Hell, if it weren’t for the inheritance your grandma left you to fucking bankroll this dream, we’d barely be holding it together.”
His voice cracks, but he doesn’t stop.
“We’re here, Maddox, almost at the fucking finish line. One phone call away. And you’re risking it for what? A distraction? A secret fuck between sound checks and shows?”
Eli’s quiet. Even though he hasn’t said a single word, he’s watching, listening, because everything Beau said is right. This isn’t about breaking some unwritten band rule. It’s about survival. About the one thing we’ve all poured our souls into, year after year.
Beau presses forward until we’re nose to nose, his irises like a storm cloud on a gray day.
“She’s not a hookup, Maddox. She’s Paige fucking Deveraux. You know. P—”
“You think I don’t fucking know that?” I roar. “You think I don’t lie awake every damn night wishing I could undo this? That I didn’t know from the second I touched her it could all go to hell?”
The fire in Beau dims just a fraction. But it’s still there; smoldering above the surface, still pumping through his veins like kerosene.
“You don’t think I’vetriedto stay away from her? I can’t.”
The admission hangs there, raw and exposed, the first time I’ve ever said it out loud, even to myself, but it’s the truth.
I can’t stay away. Not because of the sex or the secrecy or thrill of sneaking around. But because she means something to me. She’s the voice inside my head when I write now, the reason my music’s better. The reasonI’mbetter.
I’ve been lying to myself, thinking that maybe I could have both. But it’s the band or the girl. The future or the feelings.
“You need to try, Maddox,” he says, his words landing exactly where he wants them. “She’s in the band. This can only end one way. You screw this up, and it’s not just you who goes down. It’s all of us.”
Something twists in my gut, not guilt, or shame, but something terrifying. Something closer to fear. Because he’s right, and I’ve already let it go too far.
