Page 78 of Blocked Shot
maybe
NATALIE
Natalie stares at the same paragraph in her textbook, the words blurring together into a meaningless mess. She blinks, rubs her tired eyes, and tries again. It’s something about the history of publishing and the rise of digital media, but she can’t focus. Her mind is elsewhere, backin Hartford.
She slams the book shut with more force than necessary. Two weeks. Fourteen days of emptiness. Of missing his voice, his touch, the way he looked at her like she was the only thing that mattered. Of replaying their last night together over and over, dissecting every word, every silence.
She’s not eating. Barely sleeping. She’s a mess. Tomorrow is her last exam of the term and she’s behind on studying because she can barely motivate herself to do anything other than lie in bed, staring at the ceiling. Everything hurts.
Her one tiny, miniscule sliver of solace is that Jesse is talking to her again, but barely. From his one word texts and from the games she streams, she gathers he’s doing better. He’s keeping up with his commitments and seems to have calmed down and started playing more sensibly.
Her phone buzzes, yanking her out of the spiral. Mila.
“Hi.”
“Oh no, you have sad voice,” Mila says, her voice light, teasing. “What are you doing?”
“Trying to study. Failing miserably.”
“Shocker. I bet you’re just staring at your book, thinking about Jake.”
Natalie flinches. “No.”
Mila scoffs. “Oh, please. I know you. And I know heartbreak. You’re zoning out, picturing his stupid, sexy Thor body, while hating yourself for leaving him.”
Natalie swallows, the ache in her chest deepening. Mila is infuriatingly spot on.
Mila pauses, then her voice softens. “Nat, you’ve gotta snap out of this. I hate seeing you like this.”
“I can’t just flip a switch, Mila. I love him.”
The words land with a weight she wasn’t ready for. Natalie swallows hard, her voice catching.
“I love him,” she repeats, quieter this time, like saying it again might make it less terrifying. “But I can’t be with him.”
And just like that, it hits her—really hits her. She’s never said those words out loud before. Not to anyone. Not even in the half-hearted way people toss them around when they think they’re in love.
The confession sits heavy between them, pressing against Natalie’s ribs like a weight she can’t shake.
Mila is quiet for a moment. “I know. And that’s why you need a distraction. So, guess what? We’re going on a road trip.”
Natalie blinks. “What? Where?”
Fantastic,she thinks flatly.Because nothing cures heartbreak like gas station bathrooms and eating Pringles in a moving vehicle.
“Not telling. It’s a mystery road trip. But I promise it’ll be good for you. A change of scenery, new energy, and most importantly, no Jake.”
Natalie leans back in her chair, staring at the ceiling. The idea of spending the weekend with her best friends sounds appealing, but she can’t imagine feeling any different, no matter where she goes. “I don’t know…”
“No. No hesitation. We are doing this. You need it. And I need my best friend back.”
“I’m still here,” Natalie murmurs.
“Not really. You’re like a ghost of yourself, and frankly, it’s creeping me out. So, here’s the deal: you pass your exam because you are a smart, capable woman who knows more about publishing than anyone I know. Then we pack our bags, get in my car, and drive until you feel human again.”
Natalie wants to believe her. Wants to believe she can get in a car and leave all this behind. But she also knows the truth: Jake is in her blood now. No matter where she goes, the ache of missing him will follow.
Still, Mila is trying. And that’s something.
