Page 24 of A Dream Shrouded in Fury
I winced at the title.If that’s how I was seen, the rest of my long existence would be a nightmare.
“Think anyone will ever talk to me again?”I asked, glancing at the vampires sneaking stares my way.
“Ah, don’t worry about them.You know they’re all greedy for some good gossip.You’ve fed them for years with this stunt.They should be grateful.”He raised his voice enough to send the closest vampires rushing away.Then he lowered his volume and returned his gaze to me.“Seriously though, Kal, I’m worried about you.If you wanted a sexy vacation, why couldn’t you have run off with one of us?I might not be on the table—or under it—but there are plenty of vampires to choose from.”
I knew he was partly joking but couldn’t help but consider the question.Thorn had sent me out to clear my head, and the universe had led me towards that ambush site.It had pushed me to find Jael and ignore the other fae.It had guided me to heal him and stick around until he opened his eyes, giving me a chance to discover just how complex, and kind, and talented he was.I’d heard his music, and it had captured my heart.
So why would the universe have been so cruel as to show me what I’d been missing only to threaten me now with stealing it away?
“Because it wasn’t about sex,” I answered.“It was about finding myself.But it’s likely I’ve lost myself instead.”
Jael
XVII
I’d been pacing the length of the small room, earning the sighs and glares of the other three, when the curtain blocking the doorway slid open and Kalla walked in.
My heart stopped, then kicked up at a rapid pace at the sight of her.In the short time we’d been apart, I’d forgotten how gorgeous she was, as though my mind wasn’t capable of holding on to a clear memory of her beauty.
Or maybe it was the contrast of her against all these other vampires, each one of them beautiful but almost artificially so.Their features were perfect, but they lacked the richness of personality I’d come to appreciate in her.Her laugh, her smiles, her passion.The whole came together to create a woman so dazzling the sun itself must have had a hand in her existence.
Her gaze, harder than I’d ever seen it, landed on me.“Come with me.”She phrased it as an order, but I heard the faint lift at the end.She was asking, not demanding, and I got the impression the question was about more than following her out of this room.
My mouth went dry as I anticipated how our conversation would go, but I nodded and gestured for her to take the lead.
“Jael—” Hethyr started, and I raised my hand to cut her off.I would be back.Regardless of what happened, I wouldn’t leave them behind again.
I told her as much with a glance.She dipped her chin in understanding and settled next to Pimmin.
In silence, I followed Kalla out of the room and down the tunnel to an empty nook.A curtain fell over the opening, and although the cloth itself wouldn’t give us much privacy, there didn’t seem to be any other vampires nearby.As long as we kept our voices down, the fae a few rooms over wouldn’t hear what we talked about.For everyone’s sake, I suspected that was for the best.
“I spoke with Thorn,” she started.
By her tone, it hadn’t been the friendliest conversation, but I didn’t allow my trepidation to show.“And?”
Kalla heaved a breath as though she hadn’t taken one all day, leaned against the wall, and crossed her arms.She’d changed clothes since she’d returned, her new leather outfit a simple black vest that hugged her middle and made her hips look that much rounder.I imagined sliding my hands over them, gripping them, pulling her towards me.My cock hardened at the vision, and I squeezed my hands at my sides to hold myself in place.
“She’s considering her options, but I think it might come down to you convincing her you’d be an asset to the fury.”Her blue gaze landed on mine.They swirled with such emotion I experienced physical pain.“She thinks you tricked me.That you never intended to stay.”
Like before, there was a question in her statement.A hint of pleading.As though she knew what I was about to say and wanted to get ahead of it.My reply caught in my throat.
Staring at her, standing this close to her, there was nowhere else I wanted to be.What Kalla had woken inside me during our time together had been a gift—even if it had transformed into a curse now that I felt forced to leave my heart and soul behind again.She’d given me a glimpse at a different life.A chance to actuallylive, but by saving the others, the sun and sky had ensured I wouldn’t get to enjoy that life.Instead, they’d given me another reminder that, in this world, I was nothing.
“Jael?”she asked before I could catch my balance.“Did you use me?Were you hoping more of your people had been found?Did you play me so you could come back here?To them?”
My eyes flew wide.“Kalla, no.Believe me, I swear I had no idea any others survived.Nothing I said to you was anything but wholly true.”Hope bloomed across her features, and my heart cracked.I stood with one foot on either side of a fissure.On one side were my feelings for Kalla; on the other was my oath to the Coynfare.Corban’s cursed words about the future weighed me down on the side of duty.“At least, it was true at the time.”
Kalla’s entire body sagged, as though my answer were a physical weight she needed to carry.Her gaze dropped to the ground, and I made myself watch her.Despite Corban’s accusations, I refused to be a coward.Not with her.
“Because of the others?”
I swallowed through the tightness in my throat.“Our leader was killed in the ambush, which means they look to me now.”
A weak excuse, but as good as any.How was I supposed to tell her that I didn’t want to wake up beside her one day hating her for holding me back?
She shoved away from the wall and stalked towards me, her burning gaze landing on mine.“That’s not good enough, Jael.What have these rebels done for you except remind you day after day of a past you want to forget?”
“They gave me a reason to live back then,” I returned.“When I finally escaped the king’s grip, I was ready to throw myself into the Taitha River.Zath found me.He taught me everything he knew about how to survive and gave me a new start.The fae I was before my time with Leonine is dead, but aiding the Coynfare was a reason for the rest of me to keep going.Taking down the king and seeking justice for everyone who suffered under his hand were my purpose.Zath died, but those three in there”—I pointed down the corridor—“are willing to continue the fight.What would it make me if I returned their gratitude with betrayal?What would it say to the remains of who I was if I let Leonine get away with what he did?”
